Touch To Transform

Monday Muse completes 15 continuous years today. It all started as a series of articles on the JCI India National President (2004) Rajesh Chandak’s theme ‘Touch to Transfrom’. Here is a poem on the theme written on the first day of 2004.. 

let go of the past… and those moments old…
cast yourself afresh… in a brand new mould!
get set to rise… on newer horizons…
“touch to transform” future generations!

Yes! we can do it… “touch to transform”…
first ourselves within… and every person along!
don’t wait for later, who knows if things remain…
”touch to transform” with your love… again and again!

“Touch to transform”… sure this is true...
life is an opportunity… with moments few!
don’t let it waste…lest you regret later…
now while you breathe, may your roots go deeper!

The luxury of a palace cannot buy you sleep…
oceans of wealth cannot quench a thirst deep!
greed pulls you down, happiness sets you free…
peace of mind transforms adversity into luxury!

“Touch to transform” the differences around…
through sincere sustained efforts, real treasures are found!
it is said so well, that time will not wait…
and that fortune favours feet, that cross failure’s gate !

Yes! we can do it… “touch to transform”…
first ourselves within… and every person along!
Don’t wait for later, who knows if things remain…
”touch to transform” with your love… again and again!

~ Pravin K. Sabnis

Side-lines

Ball boys and Ball girls are aspiring sports-persons who do duty on the side-lines. They retrieve and pass on the balls to the players or officials in sports like football, tennis, cricket, basketball, etc. Their involvement helps to speed up play by reducing the inactive time.

It is pertinent to note that this role is a huge opportunity. They get a close-up view of the play and the players. They get to see and learn the intricacies. Successful sports-persons disclose the invaluable inspiration and instruction imbibed while doing duty on the side-lines.

Besides, fitness and stamina, applicants for ball-boys or ball-girls are required to possess abilities to concentrate and remain alert. Focus is linked to passion for the game. Conversely, the passion for the game leads to focus when on the side-lines.

Not all who learn from the side-lines get opportunity to grow and glow as players. But they will make good coaches, support staff, sports journalists, commentators, score-keepers, administrators or an enlightened audience … who learnt the lessons on the side-lines.

Aspiring sports-persons must do duty on the side-lines. Aspiring performers must do duty at the side-lines and backstage. Aspiring leaders must do duty at the side-lines. What may seem non-essential activity provides the best view of the action... from the side-lines!

For the greatest learning opportunity
The aspirants must do side-line duty!

~ Pravin K. Sabnis

Hand on Rail

 A few months ago, a training interface was organised for rural students at the Nestle plant by Rotary Club of Ponda. It was impressing to note the importance given to safety norms by Nestle’s. One such insistence was to hold the hand rail while moving on the stairs. 

It seems like a needless guideline but if we consider it closely, we find it to be a life-saver. A slight slip on the steps can turn fatal. However if our hand is on the rail, we would be in control and recover our balance.

A handrail provides stability and support and prevent injurious falls while ascending and descending on stairways and escalators. Nevertheless, the handrail would be useless if our hand is not on the rail.

The analogy is apt as a lesson for life, too. Our ethics should be the hand rail that we hold on to while ascending or descending in our life. We may slip or trip on the stairs but if we hold on to our ethics, we will be safe and in control of our response to the implications of our actions.

Hand on the rail will ensure a safe day…
Hold on to ethics while moving the way!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Approval

Zen Master, Kosen was exceptionally skilled in calligraphy. Once, he was asked to sketch onto paper the words ‘The First Principle’, to guide carpenters to carve a larger carving in wooden gate of the temple. However while he sketched he was wary of a bold apprentice who stood next to him, disapproving of Kosen first effort and his next and his next… 

Kosen kept writing one sheet after another till many had accumulated, still without the endorsement of the pupil. Then, when his student stepped outside for a few moments, Kosen saw his chance to escape his keen eye. He wrote hurriedly, with a mind free from distraction. The pupil returned to see his work and pronounce, ‘A masterpiece!’

Until, Kosen was engulfed by the weight of measuring up to his pupil’s approval, he could not actualise his own capability. The pressure weighed him down and distracted him from his own natural performance. The momentary exit of his student freed him of the tension and he was able to complete the task to his own approval as well as that of his pupil!

So often, we succumb to the stress and strain of approval and expectations of others, not only when surrounded by them, but also in their absence. Worrying about what others will think about what we did is the biggest distraction that side-tracks us off our path. To be better at doing anything, we need to liberate ourselves of the anxiety that comes out of worrying about appraisal by others.

A distraction and a deadly strain
The burden of approval is a pain!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Best?

Two years ago, the celebrity dance-choreographer, Terence Lewis shared an interesting learning from his inspirational life. As a child he would participate in every contest and would keep winning prizes, especially in dancing.

After winning yet another dancing competition, he proudly went on stage to receive his trophy at the hands of the Chief Guest and Main Jury. While handing over the Cup, the lady muttered, ‘You were the best among the worst!’ Terence was stunned.

Thinking that he had heard wrong, he approached the lady again. She insisted that he won only because the others in the competition were bad performers. The incident triggered a paradigm shift in Terence’s approach towards dancing. He was no longer interested in winning. He worked hard to get better and better to be what he is today!

Often, we involve in disproportionate celebration of a below par show in a below par competition. We delude ourselves that we have achieved great success when we may have not have scaled mediocrity. Such delusion defeats real growth in competency and capabilities.

On social media, we see such delusions in plenty. Self-declarations of average achievements and self-gratifications are further propped up by excessive appreciation that is contrary to actual reality. In such cases, we must correctly evaluate where we stand and do what needs to be done to be better!

Where mediocrity runs, the race is no test
Don’t delude yourself about being the best

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Excelsior!

Last Monday, the iconic comic book author Stan Lee passed away. In collaboration with others at Marvel, he co-created popular fictional characters: Spider-Man, the X-Men, Iron Man, Thor, the Hulk, the Fantastic Four, Black Panther, Ant-Man and others. On his death the term, ‘excelsior!’ was trending on twitter.

Stan Lee had used ‘Excelsior!’ as his signature sign-off line for decades, and it fundamentally infused the comic book industry's collective subconscious. ‘Excelsior!’ is also the name of Stan Lee's autobiography. Lee, when asked, would define the word as meaning ‘onward and upward to greater glory.’

‘Excelsior!’ is an inspirational thought. It is about not resting in erstwhile magnificence. It is about moving ahead to take on greater challenges. It is about progressing beyond the best of performances to greater glory. It is about living a life like Lee, constantly embarking on newer initiatives and creatives.

So often, so many of us allow the burden of previous performance to weigh us down into a comfort zone of relaxing and resting in the achievements in the past. True living is to stretch out of that complacence. Even after surmounting a peak, we must move on to scale newer peaks… onward and upward to greater glory… Excelsior!

On laurels do not halt to relax and rest
Excelsior! Move on to better your best!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

This earth is ours, the sky is too

(this poem written in May 2001 is based on the Mitwa song from the Hindi movie, Lagaan… an effective training tool used by me to underline ownership of passion, positivity and synergy… different lines have appeared as meaningful concepts in various blogs of Monday Muse since 2004… now it appears all together)

Every saint says so…
Every sage says so…
If you possess sincerity and daring
Eventually, you'll find yourself winning!

Don't mind the length of the road..
Don't tire out under the load
Listen to the essence of my words..
Don't disappoint these inviting roads

King of this world... that's you...
Believe this fact to be true
Take all troubles head-on....
Never sing a loser's song
Why does fear overpower you?
This earth is ours, the sky is too!

The thoughts in your mind...
Are mine too, you'll find
Your dreams are akin to my life mission…
Lamps of hope lit up our vision.
May these lamps never wane…
Come storm, thunder or rain!

The skies will sing, fun will gather...
Only if you and I call out together
The season of flowers shall bloom..
Bringing happiness and chasing the gloom
Together we can create a colourful way...
Why do you keep alone and away?

Why does fear overpower you?
This earth is ours, the sky is too!


~ Pravin K Sabnis

Diwali

Effigies of evil strut in the streets…
Loudspeakers blow, drums beat…
The blaring music, the rhythmic dance…
Carnaval is back with its mesmeric trance!

Is it a time to be happy and gay?
Or is it just revelry gone astray?
Questions stagger in the mind…
Why does the light seek to blind?

The youth celebrate the blinding blaze
And children watch in innocent daze
As the sky breaks into another dawn
Everyone is now beginning to yawn…

It is time to sleep, you know…
It is Diwali – the festival of lights!

(poem written in November 1991… In Goa, effigies of Narkasura are burnt early in the morning. Due to keeping up all night, most of us would feel sleepy on Diwali day)

- Pravin K Sabnis

Switch On Off

At the Installation ceremony of Samraat Club Ponda, the Chief Guest Rajesh Pednekar was explaining how he could manage to play many parts. He has acted in diverse roles in theatre as well as in cinema. He has excelled in playing cricket as well as a vastu consultant. He has produced films and keeps involving in varied initiatives. 

Rajesh explained that he relied on the ‘switch on switch off’ technique. This meant switching single focus on a single commitment and switching off from other priorities till that commitment was fulfilled. He insisted that this was the best possible way for full application of mind and senses to the declared commitment.
So often so many of us, are distracted by different pulls by different priorities. We keep one eye on the immediate goal and another on the parallel periphery. We end up being unfocused and side-tracked from the task at hand. Indeed it is important to switch off from other stuff to be able to truly switch on to the present engagement.

Today (and for the past few days) I have done just that. I ‘switched off’ from other things and ‘switched on’ to being an organising team member of the JCI World Congress in Goa. After a tough day, I ‘switched that off’ and sat down to ‘switch on’ the penning of this Monday Muse. Although, the clock is moving on to Tuesday, I am satisfied with my dealing of both the involvements.

Indeed it is the best way to be happy and satisfied in doing what you really want to do. Focusing in two directions may lead to vague vision and confused mission. We must switch on to the bird in hand and switch off to the two in the bush. Like Rajesh Pednekar does so happily and effectively…

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Roots & Shoots

30 years back, I met a philosopher poet. When I appreciated the sling bag that dangled off his shoulders, he responded to say, ‘This bag carries only a few books. The one within carries the book of life… and that is the real one!’ Even his prose was as poetic as it was multi-layered.

He seemed to speak in earthy wisdom as well as from a global perspective. His words opened insights into village folklore as well as modern thoughts. He fiercely propagated his mother-tongue, Konkani as well as mastered expression in diverse languages like Bengali, Hindi, Marathi, Portuguese and English.

He had deep roots and free shoots. A lyrical poet who played many parts as teacher, magazine editor, translator, organiser and many more, Ramesh Bhagvant Veluskar passed away yesterday. But the Sahitya Akademi awardee lives in the hearts of every person he met in person or through his writing.

Some of us remain rooted in our own world and ignore the larger world. Some of us see the larger perspectives but are ignorant of our roots. Splendid trees are the ones who reach out to the sky while sending their roots deep down into the earth. Such were the significant lessons from the life of Ramesh Veluskar.

Though passionate about his ethnic roots, he opened easily to diversity of humanity. A reservoir of folklore, he appreciated contemporary art in various forms. His love for his mother tongue did not prevent him from embracing other languages. His emotional sensitivity marched hand in hand with rationality. Ramesh had both, deep roots and shoots as wide as the sky… a meaningful and inspirational way to live a full life.

Roots dive deep, shoots reach sky
…Full lives like Ramesh never die!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

I.S.R.

15 October is observed worldwide as White Cane Day. In Goa, NAB (National Association for the Blind) organises an awareness walk of visually challenged students with others. The walk is on the road, crossing across traffic. The purpose is to make everyone recognise the white cane and assist its visually challenged owner.

The rally moved to Ambedkar Park. A skit was performed, best slogans were awarded and two students presented their invention of a wrist strap sensor. Mahadev Sawant called for SSR – Self Social Responsibility, where individuals would assist the visually impaired to live and work independently by having equal access to opportunities.

Individual Social Responsibility is a moral creed where individuals accept their duty toward society. Being ‘socially responsible’ is about behaving ethically and sensitively to each other’s needs. It is being accountable for our actions and being conscious of the impact our actions have on others, our communities, and the environment!

The opportunity for progress cannot be exclusive to some and inaccessible to the others. When we escape the onus of our social obligations, it results in the denial of the rights of those who need them the most. When we embrace our fundamental human responsibilities, we ensure the right to equal opportunity for all!

Individual Social Responsibility are confirmed in our actions when we assist the one who needs our assistance, when we stop in our tracks so that the other may cross across to their destination, when we walk hand-in-hand and celebrate the remarkable benefits of interdependence.

Reach out your assisting hand
ISR must be a collective trend!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Phony

Pedro phoned his friend: ‘hi… I wanted to talk to you…’
Friend sounded irritated: ‘not now… I am stuck in my car in the middle of a massive traffic jam…’
Pedro: ‘How is that possible… I have called you on your home landline!’

In the telecom age, such phony responses keep happening. Especially, due to the mobile phone, some people think they can speak any falsehood and get away with it. In the above instance, the receiver blurted out his standard answer to avoid further conversation whenever he received a call on his mobile phone.

In a scene from the Hindi film Agneepath, the character played by Amitabh Bachchan says, ‘Galat cheez banaya telephone… udhar se aadmi sochta kuch hai, bolta kuch hai, karta kuch hai…’ (Telephone is a bad thing… on the other side, the person thinks one thing, says another thing and does something else)

The phone is a wonderful invention that helps persons communicate across distances. However, the distance is used by some to mislead. Of course, all who lie may not be intentional liars but they could well be habitual liars. We must beware the tendency to be fraudulent just because we perceive that the other person can not see.

It is said so well that our character is truly determined in the dark. It is how we behave when we know that nobody is watching. We must align our values with our thoughts, our thoughts with our talk and our talk with our walk. Otherwise we may end up being phony, not just on the phone but as a worthless life habit!

Don’t be phony on phone or otherwise
The value of truth makes worthiness rise!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Often

My buddy, Ravi Sirsat had given me a mantra to lose weight. Besides keeping off carbohydrates and regular exercise, he advised to eat more often. Instead of few heavy meals, he recommended to have smaller meals at regular intervals. Lesser but more often was the way to eat!

Interestingly this mantra works at various levels and in various situations. We have a tendency to devote our attention and action in a single focus areas. We tend to lead lives with fewer priorities and end up blocking major portions of our time for fewer things. And in a tight schedule we end up not having time for other priorities.

For instance, we find it difficult to see the time to devote to our hobbies or organisations we have joined or relationships. And if we start making time for these, then we end up giving too much time and often we end up feeling the strain of over participation. But, we can choose to allot smaller sets of time… on a regular basis!

Eventually, it is not how much we eat… it is how often we eat smaller portions… less but over smaller intervals. Like overeating, overdoing anything can lead to strain, stress and a breakdown. Instead of fewer bursts of commitment, we must choose to indulge and involve more often… whether it is food… whether it is an organisation… whether it is a hobby… whether it is a relationship!

Eat less but more often
Strain will surely soften!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

The Wanderer

The wanderer keeps wandering,
unwinding, unlearning and unleashing
Exploring the beauty of the earth
In the colourful flowers that rise in the dirt

The wanderer walks to overcome fear
across rivers of tears and gardens of cheer
The path leads to someone waiting
Is it the dreams that set the heart beating?

Every glance from these paths’ maze
find colours melting in the gaze
the soothing winds, the soothing shade
Offer the vision of a destination glade.

The wanderer sees a new horizon, a new dimension
Dreams are realised by backing desire with dedication
Turn every moment into a precious one
following the call of your heart is real fun

The load on your mind will disappear
As the child in you reappears
Life will feel fresh and new
Love and bonding make a fine brew

Victory is when wanderers leave a trail
As an inspiration for others to set sail
A trail across waters and earth, high and low,
That beckon others with an invitation to glow.

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Unsolicited

A husband came into the kitchen and started badgering his wife, ‘hey! Be careful with the potato peeler… you may peel your skin! Please, watch what you are doing with the knife… you may cut a finger along with the ladyfinger! Don’t look this way… keep your eyes on the boiling pot! Hey, slow down… be careful… heed what I say!’ 

The stunned wife reacts, ‘what’s wrong with you? Why are you interfering unnecessarily… why are you giving unsolicited advice? For so many years I have been cooking without any mishaps…’

‘Exactly the point that I want to make, the husband asserted, ‘For so many years, I have been driving my car… without unsolicited advice!’

The story was shared over a long drive by Dr Vinaykumar Pai Raikar, a witty conversationalist and keen observer of human behaviour. He was making a pertinent point about the tendency to dump unsought, superfluous assistance onto others… and the disruptive distractions triggered by such unneeded interference.

So often, so many of us find it easy to direct actions of others that we may or may not be able to execute ourselves. The actor is focussed on the destination as well as the journey as well as the moving steps. But unsought directors unsettle this focus and disturb the mind by needless instructions.

Back seat driving is a role that we can easily slip into. It is a sign of disproportionate estimation of our own ability or underestimation of the capabilities of the other person. It may mean that we do not trust others or that we are not ready to let go. Even when intervention is necessary, it should not be unsolicited!

Unsolicited interference is not just upsetting
It disturbs the player and triggers unsettling!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Forced Feed

In an engaging session at the Goa Environmental Festival, Venkat Charloo (of Coastal Impact) was educating school students about marine diversity. He mentioned the tendency of human beings to feed fish (and other animals too) the food that human beings eat. This forced feed harms (and even kills) the creature.

So often, so many of us force feed not just animals but also human beings. I have seen a child that was allergic to nuts being forced to eat a chocolate with nuts in it. The child was refusing the sweet but the adult persisted saying that it is was surprising to see a child refuse chocolates.

In our country, there is a popular tradition to dump more food in the plate of the guest even if he does not want it. Besides food, we force our beliefs, prejudices and rituals on others. The intensity of such force feeding is worse when the other person is perceived as being weaker to the one doing the forced feeding.

In school, we learnt a line that said, ‘what’s good for the goose is good for the gander.’ Interestingly, this line is derived from an earlier proverb: ‘What's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander’. Obviously the sauce is to be used on a cooked goose or gander that is dead.

Force feeding kills. Force feeding suppresses. Force feeding denies the right to receive the right thing. Different beings have different needs and different capacities. When we force feed we presume that what is good for me is good for the other. But it is pertinent to note that it need not be. We must refrain from careless force feeding!

The forced feed can kill and bleed
Diversity needs appropriate deed!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Bit

One day a raging fire engulfed a forest. Frightened, all the animals fled their homes and ran out of the forest. From the distance, they watched the fire feeling powerless. Every one of them thought there was nothing they could do about the fire, except for a little sparrow.

It swooped into a stream, picked up a few drops of water, went into the forest and put them on the fire. It kept going back, again and again. All the other animals watched in disbelief; some tried to discouraging and disparaging the sparrow with comments like, ‘your little efforts will have no impact.’ The little bird said, ‘I am doing what I can’

The story was told by Makarand Anaspure during his interaction with the audience at the Goa Environmental Festival. Makarand along with Nana Patekar started the NAAM foundation in September 2015. NAAM is a manifestation of human spirit in response to the devastating conditions of drought affected farmers in Maharashtra.

Makarand was speaking as a rejoinder to a question whether small efforts could cope with the gigantic problem of drought. He insisted that the history would remember the little bird as one who fought the fire. He insisted that we must choose to be part of the solution rather than be motionless onlookers. We must do our bit!

It is the little drops that turn a dry patch into a wet one. It is the little drops that eventually make a sea. We must not be overawed into inaction by the magnitude of the challenge. We must focus on sincerely doing everything we can, even if it seems too tad. For the choice is only between doing something and doing nothing!

It is the sincere bit
… that will solve it!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Can you?

Often in my interactions with an audience, I ask them to raise their hands if in affirmation with my questions. The question is simple: Can you sing? Very few persons put up their hands.

Then I expand the question: Can you sing the ‘Happy Birthday’ song? Can you sing the national anthem? Can you sing ‘Hum honge kamyaab’ (the version of ‘we shall overcome’)? All put up their hands to confirm that they can sing!

The question posed in the same instance is understood differently by different persons! Some view it as a question of being able to simply sing and the others as a question of being able to skilfully sing as well as the ones they view as capable to sing.

In the first instance there is no burden of comparison. There is simple understanding that one can sing. May be one cannot sing as well as others but the question was more about one’s willingness and basic beliefs.

When posed the question, ‘Can you?’ we must be open minded and answer it is a straight question. We must not judge our capability in context with a better performer. We must declare our ability to do what we do so well by saying, ‘Yes I can!’

‘Can you’… if the question began
The answer should be ‘Yes I Can’!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

As you please

My father, K N Sabnis was a great influence on my perspectives in life. During our childhood, he once offered to serve ‘English Tea’ in the evening. My brother and me rushed back home, during our break while playing. We were disappointed to see a scene far below our high expectations.

We expected some exotic form of tea. But we found our regular tea waiting in separate containers as tea, milk and sugar. We had to mix the three items in a cup and stir it to prepare our cup of tea. When asked about the difference from the regular, he smiled and said, ‘you get to make your own cup as per your wish!’

‘As you please’ is a wonderful phrase that indicates the right to choose and get what one wishes for. In an increasingly mechanical world, it offers options based on needs and wants. It offers discretion beyond the single choice of uniformity. It empowers the individual’s power of free will.

So often, so many of us offer no choice to the recipient of our gift. So often, so many of us refrain from disclosing our preference when something is forced upon us. Choice is eventually about options and the freedom to select as you please.

Choice is also about onus. It is about taking ownership of one’s needs and wants. It is about being sensitive to the needs and wants of others, instead of forcing uniformity. It is about allowing others to make their cup as they please! It is about insisting on exercising the choice to make your own cup as you please!

As free will and onus increase
Make your cup… as you please!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

India

Some 20 years ago, Panaji Jaycees had arranged a talk by Placido D’Souza a former foreign services officer. After his talk, the floor was opened for questions. Since nobody was asking him any questions, the Chairman called out my name. I asked him, ‘How do you project the image of India to the foreigners?’

In such situations, when forced to ask questions we tend to ask queries that we have answers to. If I were asked the same question, I would have waxed eloquently about our great heritage, our rich diversity, our impressive history, our great culture, our heroes, so on and so forth…

But his answer was an eye-opener… Mr D’Souza said, ‘We project India as the land of the white revolution (milk), green revolution (agriculture), telecom revolution…’ He was basically talking about verifiable achievements from recent history instead of over glorified generalisations from the distant past.

We depend on a distant past to justify our pride in our country… But if we connect to the real achievements that are going on, we connect to the present. We must also accept and overcome our shortcomings. The past, good and bad, tells us where we have come from. But our response now, determines where we will go.

We need to identify our role (in the present) to write the script (of the future) of India. We must choose to be sincere, sensitive and responsive citizens. On every surface we walk… to every person we meet… in every situation we encounter… may we play a positive proactive role for our India!

We cannot rest on real or illusory history
India needs us to act NOW for posterity!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Friend

The first Sunday of August is occasion for wishing friends on social media. Friendship Day was started by the greeting card industry. However with the spread of social networking sites, the greetings have grown with the copy-paste forwards. The sentiment may be well-intentioned but it may not reflect true relationships.

In the virtual world, the emotion is sometimes one-sided, sometimes pretence, sometimes self-centred and sometimes it is a craving to belong to the trend. It is a race to get more virtual connections than one’s colleagues in the virtual world. There is a symbiotic relationship to over praise and use superlatives.

Of course, there are many genuine friends who may use the occasion to celebrate their bond, but they would do so even without occasion. There are instances of social media strengthening the bonds of friendship. However it is pertinent to note that there are many more factors than mere declarations on friendship day.

Friends find reason to create moments to breathe life into their relationship. They do not pay superficial lip-service. They choose to share joys and sorrows, good and bad times with their friends. Friendship is about cooperative and supportive behaviour between persons. It involves acceptance, affection as well as trustworthiness.

You cannot really force someone to be your friend. But, you can choose to be true friends with the person who you want as friend. Being worthy is about being dependable, showing affection, sharing and caring. And all these must be done in the real world in real ways in real space… not just virtual!

If I am a worthy friend in every way
Every day will be a friendship day!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Not Crooked

On social media, Pedro received a forwarded photo. It captured the hammering of a straight nail into the woodwork, leaving aside a line of crooked nails (that got bent with the first blow of the hammer). The caption spelled out the lesson: ‘The crooked ones will be left alone; the straight ones will get hammered!’ 

Pedro responded with a diagonally different interpretation: Those that are crooked will be discarded in the scrap heap. Those that are straight will end up being useful!

So often, the nicest of persons, who walk the upright path, are sure that they are going to face the brunt of being ‘straight’. They may continue to align with their values, yet they are convinced that the crooked cheats will get the better returns.

While it is true that the choice to be ‘not crooked’ may result in tough outcomes, we must realise that it is the best thing to do. It empowers trust and enhances our trustworthiness. People rely on the ‘straight’ ones and stay away from the ‘crooked’ ones. Mankind has found use of those who are ‘not crooked’.

Believing in the usefulness of being ‘not crooked’ is very important to being happy with the choice that one has made. Just being ‘straight’ is not enough. We have to also believe that we are doing the right thing. We must rejoice that we have chosen to be ‘not crooked’.

The ‘crooked’ may seem to instantly benefit…
Into worthiness, the ‘not crooked’ will truly fit!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Within

Mulla Nasruddin had lost his ring in the living room. He searched for it for a while, but since he could not find it, he went out into the yard and began to look there.

His wife asked: “Mulla, you lost your ring in the room, why are you looking for it in the yard?” Mulla said: “The room is too dark and I can’t see very well. I came out to the courtyard to look for my ring because there is much more light out here.”

One of the interpretations of the Mulla Nasruddin fable is to search within for that which lies hidden there. So often, so many of us search for things on the outside because we find it convenient to explore and examine the situation in sight. But the real search may lie within where they are to be truly found.

The ‘streetlight effect’ refers to the inclination for people to look for whatever they are searching in easier-to-look places instead of in the places that are most likely to yield the results they seek. Instead of introspecting and inspecting within, we keep searching in the outer world. The answers lie within!

Why search on external ground
Seek within for lost to be found

~ Pravin Sabnis

Interest - MondayMuse of 16 July

On our tour to Uzbekistan, an interesting incident occurred in Samarkhand. We returned from dinner to our lodging. An enthusiastic group from Fergana had organised a dance party. Our group was invited to join.

We swayed to the dance steps, lyrics and music of their Uzbek culture as well as Hindi film songs. We followed their steps. They followed our steps. Our diversity blended to a happy collage of smiles.

By 10pm, the music had to be stopped. But the dancing continued as they sang their songs and we sang a Konkani number. But the most interesting thing happened afterwards. The two nationalities were animatedly interacting with each other for over forty minutes. That they did not understand a single word of each other's language did not matter!

It was a great reminder that no barriers can prevent interaction if there is interest in the other person. We take extra efforts to express and extra efforts to understand if we are interested. It is pertinent to note one of the meanings of the word 'interest': the feeling of wanting to know or learn about something or someone.

The converse is true too. If we are not interested, no common ground will be good enough. Whenever we struggle with interpersonal skills, it could be due to a deficit of 'interest' in the other person. 

All interpersonal barriers will be put to rest

When we discover (in the other person) interest!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Tashkent, Uzebekistan

posted on 16 July 2018

Deference

‘I am a novice compared to others in the room.’

‘I am way behind the worthy elders in the hall.’

‘I am lesser to the greater personalities around me.’

So often people over express their deference whilst reciting a poem, delivering a speech, suggesting an idea or performing in the presence of relatively senior persons. Some may be faking humility. Some are preparing ground to avoid being judged critically. Some are dropping their confidence. Some are playing it as reverence.

Deference is a position of surrender often leading to passivity. The state of submitting to the espoused influence of one's superior, often leads yielding to restrictive judgement of capacity and competency. While it is good to express reverence to the ones we respect, over deference is no good!

Deference will be oft seen by the others, as well as by the self, as a confirmation of inability. Deference cannot be confused with humility or respect for others. It may be a cunning act or a reflection of low self-esteem or just a cultural habit that believes that being submissive is of greater glory than being assertive.

Many wrongly feel that deference is the opposite of aggressive pride. Hence they choose submission instead of aggression. But it is pertinent to note that positive assertiveness is the right choice instead of needless deference. We can retain humility, modesty and respectfulness while being firmly assertive.

Modesty is a virtue… as is reverence
But a bane is unnecessary deference!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Maintain

The gardener shared his secret, 'The first part is difficult… levelling the land as per design, adding the right top soil, arranging the drainage and other necessary things. The second part is simple and easy… just regularly trim the plants, weed them and water them. Keep doing that and you get a garden that remains maintained!' 

The best of gardens are not just well designed. They are well maintained. Without sustained maintenance, great gardens degenerate to pathetic form. As important as the initial design (if not more) is the follow-up to maintain the initiative. The one who maintains is the one who sustains!

What is true for a garden is true for every endeavour for excellence. So often, we put up our best efforts while creating something. We manage the difficult part but falter at the easy part. Well begun, it is said, is half done! But if we do not maintain a continued consistency, our best start can be undone.

Consistency is the hall mark of real achievers. They maintain a positive approach to the things they started. They buttress their vision with a mind-set of mission and the ability to be both, dogged and diligent. Steadfastness holds the key to success. Persistence is a value that ensures that we can sustain the advantage of a good start.

The garden needs steadfastness to maintain
Consistency ensures that result will sustain!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Crawl

In 1975, on 25 June 2018, a National Emergency was imposed in India. The stated justification was ‘internal disturbance’. The real reason was to clamp down on mass protests against the Government. Civil liberties were curbed. It remains a dark period of fear in India’s history.

There were many citizens as well as journalists who bravely resisted the excesses of the Emergency. There were others who succumbed to the scare and refrained from protest. But there were some who yielded and capitulated to the diktats. About such persons from the media, L K Advani famously said, ‘You crawled when asked to bend!’

So often, we crawl when asked to bend. Gandhi referred to fear as ‘creative imagination’. It looks larger than it is. We can cope with this fear by fight or flight. But when we flee fear, it follows fiercely. This leads to the resigned choice to crawl when asked to bend!

The ones who stand up to fear deserve appreciation. The ones who are deterred by the fear deserve understanding and consideration. But the ones, who crawl, even when asked to bend, need introspection. Those who are in a position to stand up but nevertheless grovel have no justification. They are part of the nexus.

Even today, we find persons who do not have the courage to stand up or just speak out against the wrongs. Our character is confirmed only in challenging conditions. Standing up for values and principles is important to ensure that the unacceptable does not go unchallenged. Otherwise we will crawl even when not asked to bend!

Heed, if we crawl when asked to bend…
We yield and aid the detrimental trend!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Reverberate

A young learner was enthused about acquiring knowledge and skills. At the very first meeting with his master, he asked how he should prepare himself for his training. ‘Think of me a bell,’ the master explained. ‘Give me a soft tap, and you will get a tiny ping. Strike hard and you'll receive a loud, resounding peal.’

Like all Zen stories, the above incident puts across a simple yet profound truth. The best of bells reverberate to their fullest capacity when they are struck right. To make the most of what we are working on, we must give it our all.

We see an amateur make a mess of the best of drums while the accomplished percussionist can make melodious music even with a set of kitchen pans and pots. The latter knows where, when and how to strike. Their approach is never half-hearted or tentative. They play full on!

We must let go of restrictive efforts that limit our results. It is said so well that ‘If it is going to be, it is up to me.’ So the next time, we see the bell of opportunity, let’s realise that it is our strike that will decide the quality of reverberations. Hence we must strike well!

For every bell of potential expectation
Our strike triggers the reverberation!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Joy

The ultimate quest that we yearn for is happiness. Every achievement or success means less if it does not bring along inner joy. We wait for happy moments without realizing that the moment that went by and that the moment that comes will bring happiness only if choose to be happy. 

We tend to set too many criteria for happiness: ‘when I get this’, ‘when I have more money’, ‘when I have a better house, better furniture, so on and so forth’ and we forget to live every day, enjoying the moment. Eventually joy is an attitude not a destination.

So how does one become joyful? We can learn from little children. They can gleefully play with empty boxes and other trivia. For them, the sights of a bright flower or a chirpy bird or a gushing stream or a rainbow are triggers of great joy. A day of play with friends and family, whether outdoors or indoors, are occasions for joyfulness.

Surely, we were the same when young. We should be reclaim our ability (as a child) to truly live in the moment, not just based on the things in hand but the imagination to see them as things of joy! More important than money and material are the valuable moments of time invested in enjoying simple pleasures to be joyful.

Real or imagined… every little toy
Is opportunity to dip deep into joy!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Refuse

The essential part of a buffet is that the diners can see the food on offer and select from a wide choice of variety. Yet at the most sumptuous buffets, many of us eat a bit of everything and end up overeating to the point of discomfort. We find it difficult to refuse even when not forced to eat.

At the smaller buffets, we are better at exercising restraint. But when the buffet spread gets larger in terms of food items, we lose control! It is a human behavioural trait that when we are offered plenty of options, our judgement is affected. When we are spoilt for choice, our choice gets spoilt and awry.

It is pertinent to note that when we don’t refuse, we receive refuse. The first ‘refuse’ is the verb that expresses our unwillingness to accept. But the second one refers to the worthless, unwanted or plain, simple trash. Those who cannot refuse the excess on offer; end up having excess refuse in their stomachs.

The analogy can be applied in many spheres including environmental concerns. The mounting menace of trash heaping up is a matter of distress. However, it is clear that gluttony is the cause and this gluttony is born of the inability to refuse the excess. We consume more than we require and end up with a growing pile of refuse.

We can do our significant bit for our environment by refusing the needless. We should refuse to use vehicles when we can walk. We should refuse to acquire more when we can use less. We should refuse to consume more when we can consume less. When we refuse thus, we will be relieved of refuse in our bodies… and in our world!

For the ailment of profuse refuse
The ointment is to simply refuse!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Deracinate

On International Biodiversity Day, Goa’s vibrant forest officer, Paresh Porob delivered the keynote speech at an event organised at the International Centre, Goa. His talk showcased many insights based on his learnings and experience with the locals staying on the borders of the notified wildlife sanctuary.

He mentioned that the tribal community of ‘Velips’ would not pluck off all mushrooms on a termite mound. More importantly, they would use hands not scalpels to collect the mushrooms. They believed that the termite mound was alive and did not want to hurt it. However, others would use bill hooks that would damage the termite mound by the deracination and adversely affect future growth of mushrooms.

The word ‘deracinate’ comes from the French ‘déraciner’ (‘dé’- expressing removal and ‘racine’ referring to root). While deracinate refers literally to the uprooting of plant roots, it has a second metaphorical meaning suggesting removal of anyone or anything from native ‘roots’ or culture.

So often, so many of us are seized by a greed that goes beyond our real need. The greed turns us blind to the fact that our act to deracinate leads to the eradication of the resource that we need. Some deracinate because they are in undue haste. Some deracinate because they are plain careless. Others think only of present need.

Indeed, we deracinate because we are insensitive. If we are conscious of our sense of responsibility, we will employ the ability to choose the right response. Our response should ensure that we do not deracinate. We must ensure that our use of the resource does not make it disappear. Sustainability should override the tendency to deracinate.

Sustainable means can overrule greed
Deracination fulfils only current need!

~ Pravin Sabnis

não compreendi

In the early 1990s, I joined a course to learn basic Portuguese. On the very first day, our teacher told us that we must speak only in Portuguese in the class. She told us that this approach would help us learn the language better. And if we had difficulty in understanding we could say, ‘não compreendi!’ (Literally: ‘can’t comprehend)

I struggled to comprehend what was being communicated to me in Portuguese. However, I could keep the conversation going by saying ‘não compreendi’ repeatedly till I understood what was being said. The other person would use simpler language or body language or even speak in English to make me understand.

So often, so many of us do not reveal that we have ‘not understood’ what was told to us. Some worry about displaying their difficulty and be branded as a person with limited comprehension ability. Some feel that they will understand in due course. Some believe that the incomprehensible may not be of great significance.

It is pertinent to note that when we don’t ask for help, we will not get it. We must be transparent about disclosing our difficulties in comprehending the communication. When we do so, we can be helped by explanation or clarification by the other party. We also display our interest in the conversation.

There is no shame in declaring our inability to understand. We must know what we don’t know. And we must not pretend to know. We must show (tell) that we don’t know (understand). We must ask for assistance in our sincere efforts to comprehend. We must declare ‘não compreendi’ whenever we are in a situation of disconnect.

Don’t pretend to understand the difficulty
Trigger clarity by saying ‘não compreendi’!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Overripe

A Goan family owned many mango trees and the mango season would fill up the house with mangoes kept for ripening. The family could feast on excellent home ripened mangoes but this was not to be. Every day, the family members would be served overripe mangoes which were obviously past their best.

Over the season, the family would be eating only the worst mangoes as there was a new set of overripe fruit, every day. Despite having the best of produce, they were unable to enjoy its flavour. It was ironic that the abundance was useless as they were only consuming the ones on the way to decay.

To set things right, all that the family had to do was to share the ripe or near ripe mangoes with others. These would ensure that mangoes would be eaten or shared before they turned overripe. It would result in a win-win situation where everyone was eating mangoes ripened just right.

Consider the instance of tasty food that we may have cooked or ordered from outside.. There are persons who allow it to remain in the refrigerator till it decays. The choices are restricted to eating it as it is or throw it away or share the unwanted item in an act of bad generosity. All these options are bad due to their timing.

So often, so many of us hold on to things till they are past their best. Some of us share things only when they are festering to the point of decay. The timing matters. We must share when things are just right. We must let go of the tendency to hold on to things till they get spoilt. If we don’t we will have to deal with the predicament of the ‘overripe’.

Before time, stuff must be shared
Else the overripe fix will be flared!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Contrary

Some years back, at the International Film Festival of India, 'Adwait Sangeet', a documentary on renowned vocalists Pandit Rajan and Pandit Sajan Mishra of the Banaras 'gharana' was screened. In the many stories they shared about their eventful life, one interesting account was about an interaction with Osho (Rajneesh).

Osho asked the brothers, ‘what is the opposite of ‘sur’ (melody, accordant)?’ The answer seemed obvious: “besur’ (discordant, inharmonius). Osho had a different answer, ‘even the non-melodious is a type of a melody… the opposite of melody is silence, the pause between the music!’

Indeed, it is a valuable lesson! The opposite of things may not always be the ‘other’ extreme. It may be the absence of that thing. For instance the converse of love is not hatred (which is negative love). Hatred is the other end of love. But the opposite of love is indifference – the absence of response.

So often, so many of us confuse the other end of the stick as the converse of it. The contrast need not be the antithesis. The contrary may be the absence of the hypothesis. If we think on this lines, we will be more concerned about the absence rather than the albeit adverse presence.

The discordant is still a type of concordant
The contrary is absenteeism created dent!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Buddha

‘If You Meet the Buddha on the Road, Kill Him’ – Zen quote.
Like all Zen quotes it is open to varied interpretation. A simple reading would suggest resisting charlatans who claim they are enlightened… It could suggest exposing and challenging the fake teacher... It could insist that reverence leads to the illusion of learning… there are other insights too!

It is pertinent to note that Buddha refers to the one who is enlightened. Siddhartha Gautama was a Buddha who propagated an interaction with the self to introspect, question and search for answers. On enlightenment, one becomes a Buddha!

In order to see the Buddha, you have to BE the Buddha. If you aren't enlightened, you can't really see the light. Once you become the Buddha, you can let him go. Once you ‘meet him on the road’ then you have no more to learn from ‘him’.

Holding on to learning becomes a dependency like that of a crutch. No learning is meant to be held onto. It is meant to provide an experience for where you are at in the moment. In a different situation and different context, the same learning will not be valid. It will lead to a new meaning, and a new experience.

Learning is a stepping stone to the next level of understanding. Holding onto learning keeps one in the same place. One must unlearn and move on to move ahead. Enlightenment from learning (Buddha) is necessary but we have to progress to further learning by transcending restrictive reverence!

Learn from Buddha to become like him
Next unlearn and step beyond his rim!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Converse

Pedro noticed a few grey strands in the mane of his teacher. Immediately, he reached out to pull one of them. He was reprimanded, ‘plucking grey hairs make more grow back.’ Nevertheless, Pedro pulled out a few strands of hair.

His teacher was furious, ‘How dare you? Do you want my hair to turn white?’ Pedro calmly replied, ‘I plucked your black hair to make more of them grow!’

We learnt in school that the converse of a theorem happens when the conclusion and hypothesis of a theorem are switched. For example, if you have a general theorem that says ''if this, then that'', then the converse theorem would say ''if that, then this''.

While all converses may not be true, we need to examine our belief statements for being true as theories as well as their converse. When we scrutinise our beliefs and values, they must match up for consistency for the premise as well as the conclusion.

So often, so many of us flaunt hypothesis that are found wanting when seen in the converse. In social media as well as social transactions, we must ponder whether the validity of our premise stands the converse of the conclusion.

Our beliefs must pass the test of reverse
Premise must be confirmed in converse!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Unnamed

The 2008 Hindi movie, ‘A Wednesday’ depicts a retired police commissioner narrating a sequence of events that unfolded on a particular Wednesday. An unnamed man calls to inform that he has placed explosives at different crowded spots in the city. To ensure that they do not explode, he asks for the release of four arrested terrorists.

But when the terrorists are taken to his stated location, they are blown by a bomb. The unnamed man has avenged the terrorist attack that killed innocents. His task done, he destroys all his gadgets and leaves to run into the commissioner who has identified him on the basis of a face sketch and by hacking his location.

The film ends with the voiceover of the commissioner saying that the man told him his real name but he does not wish to reveal it since doing so would give away the man's religion. And it would change the context of the intent of the man’s actions.

Disclosing the identity of rape victim remains a grey area. Even when protected by an Indian Penal Code, the media and those on social media err on the side of caution. For three years, the identity of the girl everyone referred to as Nirbhaya or the fearless one was legally ‘concealed’ even though her name was thrown up careless persons.

In today’s times of the information boom, prejudiced posturing is dependent on ‘name’. The response depends not on humane values of justice but on the context of the names of the aggressors as well as the victims. It changes depending whether the ‘name’ is one from ‘among us’ or the ‘others’.

Some of us wear tinted glasses. Our response is based on the ‘name’. We must not allow our prejudice to jaundice our perception. The act of a criminal or the plight of a victim has to be seen for what it is, not for their name. Names are just incidental labels. It is the criminal or the casualty that must be responded to aptly. Unnamed!

The unnamed eventually ensure a factual tale
Sans prejudice setting us off on a wrong sail!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Unnatural

During a discussion on trekking in Goa, the talk moved to littering by irresponsible visitors at nature spots. Someone mentioned how a child had cuts on the soles of his feet, when they ventured bare-footed into a forest-stream that had broken beer bottles in its bed.

While all agreed with the growing nuisance by insensitive tourists, I asked, ‘why were the children allowed to enter the water body and that too with bare feet?’ Somebody said it was natural to do so. I insisted that it was unnatural and an irresponsible act!

It is natural to be mesmerised by Mother Nature. However it is unnatural to step out of line. Beautiful butterflies are maimed by the ones who want to hold it in their hands. On the other hand, expert swimmers have died trying to save the over enthusiastic persons who walked into seemingly safe water bodies.

Nature is to be appreciated but we cannot take it for granted. We cannot cross the line of nature. So often, so many of us choose the unnatural. We involve in actions that are contrary to the ordinary course of nature. True nature lovers will appreciate the sights and sounds from a distance as they do not want to disturb or encroach.

We find many signs of caution around us… Do not pluck the flowers. Do not feed the animals. Do not touch the paintings. Do not swim in these waters. Do not bathe in the waterfall. Do not litter. Do not disturb. Indeed it is unnatural to ignore the message to not cross the line! In fact, we must heed the caution sign even in its absence!

It is natural to look but unnatural to touch
Respect the line; heed the caution notch!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Hiccups

‘Hichki’ (hiccup) is a Hindi film about a teacher (played by Rani Mukherji) with the incurable Tourette syndrome – a neurobehavioural disorder that varies from person to person. The condition may manifest as blinking, jerking of head, arm or shoulder, scrunching of face along with vocal tics like involuntary barking or repeating words. 

Despite being qualified, the teacher is not getting hired due to her recurring loud ‘hiccups’. Eventually, she gets an assignment to teach a class of combative underprivileged students who are angry at being put down by others in the school. Their ire is a hiccup that prevents them from realising their potential and purpose.

An adaptation of Brad Cohen’s book, ‘Front of the Class: How Tourette Syndrome Made Me the Teacher I Never Had’, the movie is about living with disability as well as dealing with indignity and denial of equal opportunity. It is about learning to cope with hiccups as well as learning to live with the hiccups that cannot be coped with.

The lesson is applicable to all of us. We have to identify our hiccups and cope with them. And if they cannot be controlled, we have to accept them and move ahead with them. In either situation, we must recognise the hiccup and don ownership by taking it head on. And that is not possible; we must choose to take it along.

Nevertheless the courage to do so will come from empathy for those who suffer from mild or severe hiccups. The acceptance of Autism, Tourette and other developmental disorders; coupled with eliminating negative stigma will facilitate the triumph over such hiccups. Indeed, it will script create success stories in society as well as in self!

Accept the ailment: take it head-on or take it along
Every Hiccup can be turned into a success song!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Hold on

On 26 March 1974, in Reni village (Uttarakhand), women hugged trees to prevent them from being cut. The locals had been opposing the commercial tree felling contractors. The Garhwal Himalayas had become the centre for a rising ecological consciousness of how thoughtless deforestation had bared the forest cover, resulting in the devastating Alaknanda River floods of July 1970.

The forest conservation movement was known as Chipko Andolan. It dates back to 1730 AD when in Khejarli village of Rajasthan, 363 people sacrificed their lives to save khejri trees. The Chipko movement became a benchmark for socio-ecological movements in other forest areas of Himachal Pradesh, Rajasthan and Bihar. In 1983, it inspired a similar Appiko movement in Karnataka.

The legacy of the Chipko movement is inspirational. It is an example of how not to let go and hold on. The brave villagers did not involve in just an occasional act. They stuck to their determination to save their environment. The continued aggression of the vested interests has been resolutely countered by a refusal to give up the struggle.

Most of us have an interest to involve in positive initiatives. However, many of us retreat from the cause that we are committed to. Among the various reasons for withdrawal, the prime one is that we are not dedicated to ‘hold on’ till the end. Being faithful to our pledge requires the conviction that the Chipko collective displayed.

Our world requires us to ‘hold on’ to the initiatives that we have identified as a worthy need. But the ‘need’ has to be transformed into an unyielding ‘want’. Such clear commitment will ensure that we do not give up. Legacy is created by the persons who stick to their vow as they know no other end than the one they want.

Everything has to be well in the end…
And if not, ‘hold on’… it is not the end!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Green Then

‘How green was my Valley then, and the Valley of them that have gone.’ This line is from a 1939 novel by Richard Llewellyn, born of his conversations with local mining families in Gilfach Goch, South Wales. It was made into an Oscar award winning film that chronicles the loss of a way of life due to coal mining and its effects on the family.

The story is universal and true even today… the devastation of livelihoods and dependency on the vagaries of exploitative jobs… the destruction of ecology and the degradation of the quality of life… the complicity of the authorities and irresponsible illegalities by the raiders of the earth…

But most pertinent is the insulated indifference of those at distances, who love the green valley but will do nothing to keep it so. We lament that the valley is green no more but refuse to stand in solidarity with those who endure in traditional livelihoods. We take up cudgels for the mining dependents (who deserve concern) but we ignore those affected (uprooted) by the quarrying.

Eventually we must quit the whine song about a green valley gone. We must involve and support ways to keep it green or revive it. We must ponder over our contribution and choices now! The valley was green then because someone kept it or made it that way. We must maintain what we can and restore what we failed to maintain.

The green then was born of efforts of those who involved in sustainable livelihoods and others who recognised and supported them. The quality of life came from those who believed in collecting fruit that fell off trees, instead of felling trees to pluck the fruit. The green then was nurtured by a responsible and responsive approach. Now it requires similar actions to ensure that the valley remains green for the future.

Green then was our valley catering to real need
Green now it can be if we halt our hurried greed!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Reason to write

A series of postal letters (penned for a TV show) turned into a bestseller book. It inspired so many to involve in the experience of writing and reading. Poet, lyricist and scriptwriter, Arvind Jagtap’s book is titled ‘Patras Karaan Ki’ – a line in Marathi that most letters start with. It literally means ‘the reason to write this letter is…’

Arvind’s letters are engaging due to the expression of pertinent social issues. He is not just a creative writer but a proactive responsive citizen as well. Arvind does not just write lines worth reading. His words are born of his walk… he involves in apt actions to positively impact the situation around him. It is indeed a lofty ‘reason to write’!

There are many reasons to write. Firstly it is better than speaking for various ‘ins and outs’. Writing is born of considered thinking while speaking is often spontaneous. We can edit our written words as we have the opportunity to view our expression and measure whether it matches with intent.

The written words can be treasured. Typed letters and hand written cards are more likely to be retained as nostalgic possessions compared to what one may have heard. Writing can easily turn into a dialogue that continues and when it does, the bearing is better on communication between the persons involved.

Most importantly, the written word is about ownership. We cannot deny what we wrote. We may clarify, retract or explain. But we cannot give up ownership of our expression. Hence, we are consciously careful about the choice of words while writing. It is pertinent to note that the best of speeches are written before they are delivered.

We must write to communicate to persons we interact with to articulate our thinking, aspirations and emotions. We must also write to unveil our inner thoughts first to ourselves and then to others. Writing is liberation of expression. There are many reasons to write. We must find one but write to reason (not without thinking)!

Find reason to write… but write to reason
Writing is best expression in every season

~ Pravin Sabnis

Que Sera Sera

On Saturday I watched the film ‘K Sera Sera’ once again. Produced by Rajesh Pednekar and directed by Rajeev Shinde, two long-time collaborators in creativity, the Konkani film has brought together the country’s best technicians, a well written screenplay and a marvellous ensemble cast led by Palomi Ghosh and Pednekar. It presents two stories that explore the theme of ‘whatever will be, will be’.

‘Que Sera Sera’ has been a popular song, written by Jay Livingston and Ray Evans, in the 1956 Hitchcock film ‘The Man Who Knew Too Much’, starring Doris Day and James Stewart. The Spanish words point out that some things are beyond our control. The deeper meaning is to accept that we cannot change everything we wish to.

The message is to choose to accept. It is a philosophy that life rolls on, moving from highs to lows. We must move beyond wanting to change everything. Of course, we must change the things we can. We must put efforts in changing things we feel we should. But if can’t change them, we must not fret and sweat.

This does not mean we should retreat to escapism or pessimism. It is not about giving up. It is about avoiding the needless burden of onus on self for things that don’t go your way. It is about pointless worries for the future. It is about over emphasis on insisting that efforts must lead to only desirable outcomes.

When we are stressed out by disproportionate suspicions about eventualities or unnecessary uncertainties, we must choose to see the positive philosophy of ‘Que Sera Sera’. It gives us the strength to face accidents like the passing away of a dear one, the failure despite the best efforts, the fears of the unknown future.

Future haunts when worries we nourish…
‘que sera sera’ allows positive to flourish!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Ready to Play

The phrase ‘Lead, follow or get out of the way’ is inconclusively attributed to Thomas Paine and many others. It appealed to me and resulted in many activity sets in my training programs. However, the third part was understood by me as different from the obvious meaning to ‘keep out of the way’.

Consider the analogy of a football team. The player with the ball is the ‘lead’ of the moment. The remaining players are meant to ‘follow’. So who would be ‘Get out of the way’? Referee? No! Coach? No! Audience? No!

Then, who? It is the players on the bench!!!


The reserve players are not playing. They are neither leading nor following. But they have to be ready to play! They have to be fully aligned to the flow of the game and be in position, to use it, if called to join play. All though not in the playing team, their focus and zeal cannot be lesser than the ones on the playing field.

It is said that teams in sports are as good as their bench strength. A high premium is placed on players who are ‘ready to play’. It is no mean task to have the tolerance to ‘actively’ wait as well as cheer on the players who are playing on the field. They display the right team spirit of supporting, observing and being ready to play!

So often, so many of us yearn for the main role (lead) or the supporting one (follow). However teams are empowered by the ones who are ‘ready to play’… by the ones who are not weighed done by the ‘waiting’… by those who ‘stay out of the way’ but stay close to the playing arena… with preparedness to play… and play to win!

The ones on the bench show the way
To ‘actively’ wait and be ready to play!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Update

The trainer was addressing his learners, ‘we update our mobiles and computers… we upgrade various appliances and machines that we use… we update our status on social media… we modernize our furniture and clothes… we tend to update everything that we use… but do we update our learning?’

A voice, from the back rows, queried, ‘Do you?’

So often, persons from my tribe (of trainers, teachers, educators), preach something that we may not be practising. Among such gaps in the ‘walk-talk’ is the tendency to insist that the learners should learn and yet we may not involve in the learning process to update our knowledge, skills and attitude.

We will not handover repairs to a mechanic who is not updated with the latest developments regarding the machine. We prefer professionals who keep updating and upgrading their know-hows and skills. Sportspersons keep trying to learn newer and better ways of playing the sport. The one who knows is the one who grows!

We must update our competencies and capabilities. As seniors, we recommend it to our juniors. As parents, we insist that our children do it. As preachers, we expect our followers to practise it. But it is pertinent to be able to affirmatively answer the question posed to us by our children, learners or juniors, ‘Do you update?’

Don’t be smug with competence of the past
Those who update are the ones who will last!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Ink it

In Std IX, we encountered Professor JAM (short for J.A. Menezes) who welcomed us to play with maths. He threw us a mental challenge in form of a series of puzzles. As we tried to solve it in our minds, he urged us, ‘don’t think it… Ink it!’ We opened our notebooks and put pen to paper… put our thoughts to the sight board.

Last Friday, our popular and effective teacher passed away. But his many lessons live on. It includes the above quote by Mark Victor Hansen which he promoted as the right way to think. It was beyond mathematics and turned out to be the best lesson for life. The best way to see our thoughts is to write them down.

There are many ways to ink it. Besides using pen, we can use pencils or colours. We can use chalk on slate. We can inscribe on sand with a stick. We can scribble on a wet surface. We use things like twigs and sticks to make various formations. We can shape out or carve in clay. Nowadays we can write on touchscreens.

When we ‘ink’ our thoughts they come in sight in a greater visual perspective. We can add or detract effortlessly. We can change or develop them better. We can reorganise and rearrange the thoughts. We can create strategies. We can define purposes. We can outline plans of action.

When we ‘ink it’ we are better placed for immediate exertion as well as a recall tool for the future. When we face with our own thoughts, we see them for what they really are. Writing down Professor JAM’s various quotes made for deeper insights every time I looked at them. They remain as memorable and meaningful as he was!

The thought in our mind needs exposure
‘Ink it’ for deeper insights and disclosure!

~ Pravin Sabnis

Appreciation

In football, the player who successfully scores a goal rarely waits for validation. He breaks into a celebration run, happily punching the air, screaming out his lungs, stretching his smile and doing the victory dance. He does not wait for appreciation from others. He chooses to bask in his own appreciation.

But my friend was not so. He played many parts: educationist, actor, singer, musician, humourist and above all an appreciator. He would be quick to appreciate the slightest of good in others. But he denied it to himself. He was always tough on himself. He was forever sacrificing for others till he sacrificed his life many years ago.

Every time, he comes to mind, he brings along a wistful emotion… of a sad life that sought happiness for others... of a giver who gave abundantly and received frugally… and the prime perpetrator was he! He did not gift himself the attitude of his appreciation. He gave others coloured clothes but wore white and black.

Our attitude is a product of experiences in our impressionable age. Negative conditioning often leads to denial of the self. William James said that the deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated. But when we deny ourselves the appreciation that we deserve, we mire ourselves in unhappiness.

My friend knew his many talents and capacities. Yet he denied himself the appreciation that he would so easily offer to others. If only, he had celebrated his amazing performances like the football player after netting the goal, maybe his life would have been happier. May he would have been alive for his birthday tomorrow!

Each needs appreciation for happiness to be…

Why wait for others when it can start with me?

~ Pravin Sabnis

Out of form – MondayMuse (22 Jan’18)

the MONDAY MUSE of 22 January 2018 was wrongly posted on my poetry blog instead of here... here is making amends...

OUT OF FORM

On Facebook, Parag Hede raised a thought-provoking point on the term ‘out of form’ which is used to explain failure of sportspersons. The deliberations identified that it could be due to distractions (lack of focus) or fortification of a bad practice (habit) or a state of mind or confirmation of incapability to measure up to new challenges.

It is pertinent to note that ‘out of form’ is not an occurrence exclusive to sports. Other disciplines too, show good ‘players’ go through periods of repeated failures or underperforming. In sports, ‘out of form’ players have to take corrective steps or step out of the next game. It should be similar for other disciplines too!

Every enterprise can have best performers slip into ‘out of form’. When it occurs, one has to introspect and take remedial actions. But we may not to do so as our failures may not be up for public scrutiny (especially in comparison to other players). We may not have a coach or a selection committee to identify our ‘out of form’ status. And few of us would publicly accept our predicament even if we were aware of it.

For our own sake, we must define criteria of performance and assign evaluators to conduct appraisals. Business teams, professionals, organisations are increasingly appointing auditors to assess performance. These performance auditors must be impartial and timely to ensure prompt remedial actions for positive transformations.

Failure to take corrective steps sets us back in our tracks. Hence we need to have assessment of our defective actions. Additionally, we need to be told the reasons for repeated mediocre results or underperforming. When we are told, we will know. When we know, we can take steps to get out of ‘out of form’!

Only when we know we are ‘out of form’…
We can walk the remedial route to reform

~ Pravin Sabnis

Little pebbles in little hands

When a little hand clenches a little pebble
not to play… but to hurl, hurt and cripple…
When with fear and rage little ones tremble
it is the loss of a mind born openly simple!

A mind of a child is for kindness to reside
but some elders unkindly otherwise decide…
Love is submerged under the reprisal tide
and the loving child turns to a spiteful side!

Future is not for diggers of the past season
who ignore lessons that lead to reason…
Lines are drawn to define loyalty and treason
and childhood bears the brunt of the hate-lesson!

And little hands are handed pebbles for hurling
at hoods who as warriors are masquerading…
Never mind the trigger, we need calm thinking
does a child’s mind deserves such burning?

No wrongs can be ever set right this way
where children are led from peace to stray…
There are better paths than the bloody bay
where missiles are born of things of play!

It is time to speak up to reach every hearing
that the larger fight needs careful considering…
Little hands are not meant for harmful hurting
Little hands are meant for positive building!

So hand little pebbles to little hands now
but not in the name of another holy cow…
Let little hands with little pebbles play to show
Little towers that rise with hope on the brow!

And if not towers let the pebbles form a way
like steps that rise to lead to a better day…
in the name of humanity let’s assert to say
‘little hands need little pebbles only for play!’

~ Pravin Sabnis
(triggered by a video of a young child carrying stones to hurl at the crooks who unleashed violence on members from his community)

Similar

Yesterday was occasion to listen to Ramesh Bhatkal speaking on the topic ‘Gandhi’s Inner Voice’. The talk was part of MOG Sunday events at Musuem of Goa (MOG) curated by Dr Subodh Kerkar. Bhatkal narrated examples to explore Gandhi’s holistic interdisciplinary approach based on his inner voice.

In the interaction that followed the talk, a person asked whether everyone was owner to the inner voice like Gandhi. Bhatkal responded with an insightful answer, ‘each has a similar inner voice, though it may be not the same!’ He delved further to explain how Gandhi evolved through his experiments with truth.

The word ‘similar’ refers to having a resemblance without being the ‘same’. We often use the words interchangeably. For instance, two persons could be wearing similar clothes without wearing the same one. In fact, things that seem similar but may not be the same. This distinctness makes all the difference.

There is a tendency to see things, situations and people in singular perspectives. But we need to notice the divergence in the similarity. Understanding the underlying diversity gives deeper insights. We often confuse similarity for sameness. Doing so leads to prejudice and restrictive thinking.

Even within a person, things evolve and do not remain the same. We may seem similar to what we were but we may not remain the same. But we have the choice to choose a positive path to that evolution of reasoning. And this thought is confirmed in aligned actions. After all, thoughts and actions must be similar!

Being similar is not the equivalent of being the same…
Distinguish the deeper diversity in the reasoning game!

~ Pravin Sabnis

MONDAY MUSE has been written since the first Monday of 2004 by Goa based facilitator-trainer; Pravin Sabnis. Share feedback at unlearning.unlimited@gmail.com or 91-8698672080

A New Page

A post on social media reminded me of what my favourite teacher, Fr Gatti taught me. He asked us to strike out an error (while writing) instead of trying to erase it or blank it out. He would say crossing out the mistake meant that one was accepting the mistake, taking ownership for it and moving on.

Though, he was my teacher in school for only one year, I kept in touch with him till he passed away. Every interaction was an enduring lesson. One day, when I asked him what if the page was full of errors, Fr Gatti promptly declared, ‘Then take a new page… start afresh without the burden of mistakes!’

So often, so many of us struggle with accepting our mistake… and if we accept, we have inhibitions in owning up to our mistake… and if we own up, we are weighed down by the burden… we remain stuck on the same page. We must start a new page!

A new page is about fresh initiative... it is about moving beyond mistakes after accepting and owning up to them. When we own up to our mistakes, it is easier to learn from our faults instead of being discouraged. Starting a new page will take away our focus from past mistakes to newer efforts.

Interestingly, faults are not just noticeable errors in the results. They may be unnoticed errors in our efforts. Starting a new page ensures that we involve in fresh efforts which may be distinctly different from the earlier ones. New initiatives will bring along newer results!

In results or efforts, so that errors do not stay
Let’s start a new page… let’s walk a new way!

~ Pravin Sabnis