Four children and others died on Saturday when the bus they were travelling skidded into a river. The driver has been arrested. The bus owner is accused of running an unfit vehicle and authorities who cleared it, are being questioned, too. Indignation is on a high but as time passes, this very emotion will turn effervescent. The unjustifiable will be justified or just be forgotten in the blame game.
In 1993, it was found that the RDX explosives got smuggled into Mumbai, due to the complicity of custom officials. While many were proven to be complicit with the crime, there was one who insisted that he was falsely informed that it was a regular consignment of silver that was being smuggled. Obviously, he found no fault in permitting what he perceived to be a lesser crime.
Degrees cannot be defined in unjustifiable acts. Yet we resort to such excuses when we make choices that are in variance with integrity. We err when we seek to defend the indefensible. What is harmful will eventually turn deadly. But till it turns deadly, we cannot insist that the degree of our action is less harmful.
To be better at being true to what is right and just for all; we must shun every unjustifiable act. We must scrutinise all actions, including our own, through the lens of uprightness, lest we turn accomplices in wrongdoing. This will give us greater strength and consistent conviction when we insist on accountability of every unjustifiable scam.
Let’s BE BETTER at steering clear of every ruse…
Wrongdoing can never be justified by any excuse!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Monday, February 20, 2012
Monday, February 13, 2012
HYPE
Ten years ago, at the inaugural of a training workshop, my colleague trainer was presented as having conducted over 500 training programs. However, he was shocked to note that I was described as a trainer who had conducted only 300 workshops. In the tea break, he pulled up the organizers for attributing lesser programs to me, despite being senior as well as more active than him.
I led my friend away and told him that the person introducing me was quoting from information provided by me. Still bewildered, he queried, ‘how is it possible?’ Calmly I suggested that maybe his figures were wrong. In the evening we sat down and realized that he had conducted lesser than 60 training programs. His statistics was obviously hyped up.
So often we indulge in publicising or promoting ourselves through extravagant, inflated or misleading claims. Over a period of time, we start believing the hype that we ourselves have generated. Eventually we start describing the hype as fact. But the biggest casualty of such hype is our own mind that succumbs to mistaken beliefs.
Beliefs based on self-generated hype delude our discerning skills and put us on shaky ground. Sadly, hype is increasingly used to stand out in a world driven by media frenzy. But to be better at rising up we must ensure that the ground we stand on is firm and real. Otherwise we cheat others, as well as ourselves, by succumbing to the attitude of deceit born of falsehoods.
When we shun fruits that chemicals have turned ripe...
How can we BE BETTER by resorting to fraudulent hype?
- Pravin K. Sabnis
I led my friend away and told him that the person introducing me was quoting from information provided by me. Still bewildered, he queried, ‘how is it possible?’ Calmly I suggested that maybe his figures were wrong. In the evening we sat down and realized that he had conducted lesser than 60 training programs. His statistics was obviously hyped up.
So often we indulge in publicising or promoting ourselves through extravagant, inflated or misleading claims. Over a period of time, we start believing the hype that we ourselves have generated. Eventually we start describing the hype as fact. But the biggest casualty of such hype is our own mind that succumbs to mistaken beliefs.
Beliefs based on self-generated hype delude our discerning skills and put us on shaky ground. Sadly, hype is increasingly used to stand out in a world driven by media frenzy. But to be better at rising up we must ensure that the ground we stand on is firm and real. Otherwise we cheat others, as well as ourselves, by succumbing to the attitude of deceit born of falsehoods.
When we shun fruits that chemicals have turned ripe...
How can we BE BETTER by resorting to fraudulent hype?
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Monday, February 6, 2012
HEAR IT
Two friends, who met after many years, went for a walk together, renewing old times. Suddenly one of them stopped and said, ‘Hey, I think I hear something.’ He put aside a loose paving stone to set free a cricket that was chirping. His friend remarked, ‘that’s amazing… so many persons are on the street at this hour, hurrying from work; yet you alone heard the cricket above all the traffic noises.’
The first calmly remarked, ‘people hear in life only what they want to hear. Right now, the noise of traffic has neither increased nor decreased… but watch.’ He dropped a coin from his pocket to the sidewalk. Everyone within an amazingly large hearing distance stopped and looked around.
The man, who heard the cricket, had been able to retain his childlike ability to hear sounds. Obviously this was aided by his interest in the sounds of Nature. The hearing ability of the crowd was restricted to materialistic motivations like the sound of coins. We are born with amazing abilities to use our senses, but for most of us, as we grow those abilities get narrowed down to hear and see lesser and lesser.
It is true that we hear what we want to hear. Hence whenever we state that we did not hear something, we need to reconsider our attitude. We must accept that the onus is on us to heed and hear. Never mind the distractions; we must be better at listening. And the way to do that would rediscover the child within… that child was born with the ability to maintain an engaging interest and hence could hear it!
We did it so well as a child who could hear it...
Let’s BE BETTER at empowering the interest bit!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
The first calmly remarked, ‘people hear in life only what they want to hear. Right now, the noise of traffic has neither increased nor decreased… but watch.’ He dropped a coin from his pocket to the sidewalk. Everyone within an amazingly large hearing distance stopped and looked around.
The man, who heard the cricket, had been able to retain his childlike ability to hear sounds. Obviously this was aided by his interest in the sounds of Nature. The hearing ability of the crowd was restricted to materialistic motivations like the sound of coins. We are born with amazing abilities to use our senses, but for most of us, as we grow those abilities get narrowed down to hear and see lesser and lesser.
It is true that we hear what we want to hear. Hence whenever we state that we did not hear something, we need to reconsider our attitude. We must accept that the onus is on us to heed and hear. Never mind the distractions; we must be better at listening. And the way to do that would rediscover the child within… that child was born with the ability to maintain an engaging interest and hence could hear it!
We did it so well as a child who could hear it...
Let’s BE BETTER at empowering the interest bit!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Monday, January 30, 2012
POINTLESS PRESENTS
So often, the organisers of events, where I get invited to speak, invest a lot of time and money in buying a present that I refuse to accept. What would I do with over 100 pointless presents in a year? I do convey my sentiments to the organisers, well in advance, but it is a modern malady to involve in a regressive ritual of unnecessary gifts.
Birthdays, weddings, anniversaries and festivals are now occasion to hand over uncalled for gifts. Most of these languish in storage space. In fact, buying gifts obligate friends to do the same, even if they cannot afford it. Even the resort of recycling is redundant as it consumes energy and resources.
My father would insist that the best present is the gift of time. But we do not want to part with our precious resource and hence we choose to offer pointless presents. The best of intentions are meaningless when the eventual action is the gift of trash or the burden of obligation. It would be better to decide to not receive or give pointless presents.
Let us offer our time and attention instead. Spending time together empowers the quality of relationship. To satisfy the great need of attention is truly a sensible thing to do. And it creates a wonderful obligation in that person to return your love and attention...
To BE BETTER at bring to fruition sincere intention...
Instead of pointless presents, gift timely attention!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Birthdays, weddings, anniversaries and festivals are now occasion to hand over uncalled for gifts. Most of these languish in storage space. In fact, buying gifts obligate friends to do the same, even if they cannot afford it. Even the resort of recycling is redundant as it consumes energy and resources.
My father would insist that the best present is the gift of time. But we do not want to part with our precious resource and hence we choose to offer pointless presents. The best of intentions are meaningless when the eventual action is the gift of trash or the burden of obligation. It would be better to decide to not receive or give pointless presents.
Let us offer our time and attention instead. Spending time together empowers the quality of relationship. To satisfy the great need of attention is truly a sensible thing to do. And it creates a wonderful obligation in that person to return your love and attention...
To BE BETTER at bring to fruition sincere intention...
Instead of pointless presents, gift timely attention!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Monday, January 23, 2012
TEST
A man believed that his wife was turning deaf. Before going for medical help, he decided to confirm his doubts through a simple test. When his wife was in the kitchen, he stood at the door, some 10 feet away, and called out, ‘Darling, what are you doing?’ He heard no answer.
He walked to an arms’ distance behind her and repeated his question. When he heard no reply, he was sure his wife was really deaf. Nevertheless, he stepped next to her, and repeated his query in her ear. His wife replied, ‘this is the third time, I am telling you that I am cooking. You should go to see a doctor for your hearing problem.’
It was the man who could not hear his wife’s answer, but he believed that it was his wife that could not hear his questions. So often we test the capabilities and competencies of others, but surely it would be better to test our own realities. If the problem lies within, the test would be incapable of reflecting reality.
So every time, we find fault with somebody, let’s ensure that our opinion is not a faulty perception based on erroneous observation handicapped by our own shortcomings. We must test our own inadequacies first, lest they negatively influence our assessment when we test others.
To BE BETTER at knowing what’s faulty...
Every confirming test must start with me!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
He walked to an arms’ distance behind her and repeated his question. When he heard no reply, he was sure his wife was really deaf. Nevertheless, he stepped next to her, and repeated his query in her ear. His wife replied, ‘this is the third time, I am telling you that I am cooking. You should go to see a doctor for your hearing problem.’
It was the man who could not hear his wife’s answer, but he believed that it was his wife that could not hear his questions. So often we test the capabilities and competencies of others, but surely it would be better to test our own realities. If the problem lies within, the test would be incapable of reflecting reality.
So every time, we find fault with somebody, let’s ensure that our opinion is not a faulty perception based on erroneous observation handicapped by our own shortcomings. We must test our own inadequacies first, lest they negatively influence our assessment when we test others.
To BE BETTER at knowing what’s faulty...
Every confirming test must start with me!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Monday, January 16, 2012
TOO TIRED TO MOVE?
A pet dog’s late night howling woke up his owner and his wife. They tossed and turned for a while. The dog’s laments continued. The wife asked her husband to go out and see the reason for the dog’s distress. The man barely stirred saying, “I’m too tired to move”.
The howling continued for another hour, and again the wife begged the husband to go and see what was troubling the dog. Again he gave the same answer, “I’m too tired to move”.
Eventually the wife went out into the night and the howling stopped. When the wife returned, the man asked, “What was wrong with that stupid dog?” “He was lying on a thorn bush” said the woman “He was just too tired to move”.
So often so many of us are like the dog – people who would rather howl and complain rather than change their position? So often, so many of us are like the man – people who would rather suffer and wait for someone else to solve their problems instead of doing it themselves. The excuse masquerading as a reason is that we are too tired to move.
Lethargy is a matter of choice not a product of circumstance. Rather than be stuck in an apathetic attitude, we must choose to step out of inactiveness. Surely it would be better to claim ownership of every predicament that surrounds us and respond aptly and promptly.
Shun the defeating excuse of being too tired to move...
Let’s BE BETTER at promptly choosing the proactive groove!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Monday, January 9, 2012
WALLS
The search is on for a “perfect” home by those who live in houses that seem “imperfect”. The quest is a better and bigger personal space and privacy. Nevertheless, in the new home too, there is a growing concern for privacy even if the number of people in the family has reduced. And the commonly preferred choice is to build walls!
The divisive wall between the two Germanys may have been brought down, but new ones rise in our homes. Balconies are enclosed with walls of brick or cages of metal grills. Windows are covered with walls of one-way glass or double layered curtains. Doors and windows are kept closed so often, making one wonder why they were put there at all. Fence walls are getting higher… gated communities are growing!
Communication gaps are widening between family members due to each one retiring to their own rooms. The same is true for relationships within neighbourhoods. This is not to rubbish privacy or security concerns. Gibran wrote, “May there be spaces in your togetherness.” We, of course, create only spaces, sans togetherness.
It would be better if we were to emulate the Japanese way of making homes. Of course they live in a seismic sensitive land that influences the design of walls which are essentially delicate frames that can slide and fold… where home is when all walls are put away! Relationships thrive only when the walls make way for an opening…
Put away the walls and open every window…
Let’s BE BETTER at making bonds truly grow!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Ooty, India.
The divisive wall between the two Germanys may have been brought down, but new ones rise in our homes. Balconies are enclosed with walls of brick or cages of metal grills. Windows are covered with walls of one-way glass or double layered curtains. Doors and windows are kept closed so often, making one wonder why they were put there at all. Fence walls are getting higher… gated communities are growing!
Communication gaps are widening between family members due to each one retiring to their own rooms. The same is true for relationships within neighbourhoods. This is not to rubbish privacy or security concerns. Gibran wrote, “May there be spaces in your togetherness.” We, of course, create only spaces, sans togetherness.
It would be better if we were to emulate the Japanese way of making homes. Of course they live in a seismic sensitive land that influences the design of walls which are essentially delicate frames that can slide and fold… where home is when all walls are put away! Relationships thrive only when the walls make way for an opening…
Put away the walls and open every window…
Let’s BE BETTER at making bonds truly grow!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Ooty, India.
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