Once, we went over to a relative’s place for a
birthday dinner. We were three: my wife, my daughter and me. The hosts were
three: husband, wife and daughter. The other guests were again a family of
three. All in all, we were just nine persons for dinner. Imagine our shock,
when we reached the dining room to see an over-laid dinner spread waiting for
us.
There were two salads, at least five preparations of
fish, two of chicken, one of mutton and three different preparations of vegetables;
besides of course two types of rice and three varieties for dessert. While I
was making a mental note of what to eat and what to skip, the other guest
exclaimed, ‘Sol Kadi naa?’ (Konkani for a popular brew made from coconut milk
and kokum). The poor hosts rushed to prepare the ‘missing’ item.
Indeed, I was
bewildered at the ability of the person to note exactly what was missing. In
fact, ‘sol kadi’ is my favourite too, but in the lavish spread, my choice was
limited to pick a few preferences from within them. With so much around, I was least
bothered about identifying what was missing.
It was unfair to
the hosts to point out a flaw in their menu when they had far exceeded the
requirement of a decent meal. But my sympathies were for the man who could only
see what was missing. At the best of restaurants, he would be unhappy to find
his ‘sol kadi’ missing. I could imagine his plight at his home dinners when he
would consistently complain, ‘Sol Kadi naa?’
So often, we notice
what is missing even when we are offered a plateful. Instead of being content
with what we have, we crave for what we don’t have. That day, the host had
given us their time, their space, their love and of course loads of food. It
was pertinent to look at the many things we received and unite those receipts
to impact our gratitude to what we got, rather than what we missed. How could
we complain, ‘Sol Kadi naa?’
Look what lies on the plate, not what’s
missing...
The receipts must ‘unite to impact’ thanksgiving!
- Pravin K. Sabnis
Goa, India.
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