SNAKEBITE

Imagine dying of snakebite of a non venomous snake… Imagine dying of a dry snakebite where the venom is not injected… Imagine getting a heart attack on seeing a snake which is actually just a coiled rope… Imagine giving up when there is nothing lost…

To be better at the right response to snakebite, we must be empowered with knowledge and basic handling skills, but eventually we must have the right attitude that does not falter at the altar of imagined fear. Suicidal panic sets faster if we are full of modern and traditional myths about the slithery reptile.

Every snakebite is not an act of aggression or hunting. It could be defensive mechanism against a perceived predator. It could also be the bite of a non-venomous snake. The outcome of snakebite depends on many factors like the species of snake, the area of the body bitten, the amount of venom injected, and the health conditions of the victim.

Now let’s look at snakebite as equivalence for being bitten (attacked) by human beings. What seems aggression could be a defensive reaction. More pertinently, in the case of ‘humanbite’, we can choose to reject the infusion of venomous hate and spitefulness. Human aggression can be tackled better if we take charge of the situation with an informed mind and an observant approach… like in case of snakebite!

An informed mind prevents the bite turning tragic,

Let’s BE BETTER at responding in peace, not panic!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

ROOTS

Little Pedro kept jumping with his little fist stretched out to grab the sky, but in vain. Despite much valiant effort, neither the sky was in his grasp, nor did he stay close to it for long… but then he saw a majestic tree that too was aiming for the sky. He knew that the tree got closer and closer to the sky by taking its roots deeper and deeper into the earth.

The lesson was obvious. The deeper the root, the taller is the tree. We can learn from the roots that go deep into the soil and transform a tiny seed into a tall tree. Interestingly, roots are of two types… roots that go deeper in search of nutrition and others which move across the breadth to cover a larger area on the ground.

Knowledge requires two initiatives: depth of comprehension as well as wide understanding. We must reach out to our roots to the realities of our environment, our culture, our people and our world. The one who knows is the one who grows. But our ability, nay, our attitude, to learn reduces as we grow. Many of us do not even touch information about our own careers leave alone other concerns.

Our quest to reach out to success must translate into our roots diving deeper and deeper into the ocean of understanding concerns! Besides, it is pertinent to note that as you grow taller and get closer to the sky, you stumble on that ultimate truth: that there is no sky! There is no limit to how tall one can grow; there is no limit to how deep our roots can go!

To get closer to the sky laden with real fruits…

Let’s BE BETTER at reaching out to our roots!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

FORWARD

For the past five years, a similar message is forwarded ‘afresh’ by many friends onto my mobile phone and email id: This year, July has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays – this happens only once in 823 years. In Chinese Feng Sui, this is called moneybags. Forward this to your friends and you will receive money in 4 days...

So often we forward to others things we receive without considering whether that thing is worthy of being passed on. When we forward anything to somebody it is a reflection of our considered opinion that it is found by us to be factual, useful and relevant. And hence we assume responsibility and confirm our approval of the ‘forward’.

The about information, for instance, is full of flaws. The calendar order of days repeats every 11 years. Nearly every year has a month with 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. July 2011 was one such month and July 2012 is not so. Obviously the ‘forward’ is the one that was sent last year. It was wrong then and now, too… for the same reasons.

The basic intention behind the forward is not dubious. In fact, the attitude of sharing is noble.  But it is pertinent to consider that when we share food, we ensure that it is worthy of eating. When we mindlessly forward trash, we are being unfair to our own ability to think and discern. To empower our competency to separate grain from the chaff, we must be better at restraining our impulse to click on the forward tab and do so only after applying the test of our thinking.  

Before hitting the forward tab, we must check and confirm

Let’s BE BETTER at the onus to understand and discern!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

MY RIGHT TO HATE!

(often, when faced with hate-groups from our own religion, a weird logic rises: If 'they' can brutalise humanity... why can't 'we' be permitted the 'right to hate' too? This poem is a tribute to the vast majority of persons who consistently choose to align every response to the core values of humanism and tolerance...)

MY RIGHT TO HATE!

If they can have their rogues, why can’t I have my own thugs too?

If they can nurture hate, why censure me, when the same I do?

It is my right to hate and fear... all those who are not like me...

And to repress and suppress all those who presume to be free!

If they can fetter their women and treat them as lesser beings...

Why the shock and the mock when I treat mine as personal things?

How dare these girls walk upright... they can’t script their fate

The open celebration of love is an affront to my right to hate!

My very culture is at stake... the leash cannot be set free

The reasoning of humanism can never deter my tribe or me...

My right to hate is truly supreme and sans any challenge

It is fuelled by age old wrongs that deserve resolute revenge!

Our enemy are those who flee our morality enclosure

Who dream of a society of free and open disclosure...

We must watch out for them... they on the other side

We must hate them and fear them and hit them and hide!

Our rights are under severe threat from all those humanist nuts...

Their sweet saccharine smiles make me want to empty my guts!

And worse are the religious ones who read the same things that I do...

Yet they believe in love and compassion for those other people too?

Those who protest our mission are the ones who walk the wrong way...

Their lives are immoral and evil, where sisters are permitted to stray!

What a silly thing to believe that we all are one and the same...

And that my lofty hate campaign is illogical and legally lame?

Our right to be regressive cannot be ever suppressed

The ideology of hate needs newer followers impressed...

So let’s spread the canard of settings things right...

The ones like us, on the other side, will help our fight!

Merchants of hate, in every corner, need a common plan

One which talks of values and violence with the same élan!

We must get together to fight ... a fight for true democracy

Where the right to hate must be one of equal opportunity!

- Pravin K. Sabnis 

IN OUR HANDS

A wise man was renowned for his ability to answer any and every question posed to him. A bright young man decided to challenge him. He held a small bird behind his back and asked, ‘Master, is the bird I hold in my hands alive or dead?’

Obviously, he had plans for the response that he would receive. If the wise one answered ‘dead’, the bird would be let loose into the air. If the answer were to be ‘alive’, he would simply wring its neck and turn it dead. The sage spoke, ‘The answer is in your hands’.

Our choices determine the implications. Hence true wisdom is about recognizing that the answers lie within. But it is pertinent to note that the answers are triggers for actions. We can choose to kill the question or set it free to take flight towards a widening horizon. Life is eventually about how we choose to respond to the situation.  

Too often, too many of us retreat into a position where we believe that our choices are not in our hands. We transfer our responsibilities, and their implications, to other hands. We give up on self-belief and weaken our self-esteem. To better at taking appropriate action, we must claim ownership of the choices we make from the ones that lie in our hands.

A song from the Hindi film, Prahaar said it so well that ‘hamari hi muthi mein aakash sara…  jab bhi khulegi chamkega taara’. (it is our fist that holds the sky… when it opens, the star shall shine)

The sky lies in our hands, you see…

Let’s BE BETTER at setting it free!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

ICEBREAKER

Once, at the end of a 3-day Leadership Camp for college students, a girl discussed her predicament with me. The workshop had kindled in her many new desires: to act in a street play, to go on a nature trail, to join a green club… HOWEVER, she was ‘sure’ that her mother would not permit her to do any of these.

When I advised her to speak about her passion to her mother, she replied, ‘my mother is not the listening type. It is she who does the talking and I do the listening… her ‘do’s and don’ts’ cannot be challenged! When I find it difficult to talk to my mother; how can I convince her to grant my wishes? What do I do?’

I suggested, ‘Every time you see your mother, hug her, smother her with your love. Be ready for the ‘side effects’: she will get angry, irritated; she may push you away and ask you to quit childish behaviour… Do it at least five times a day. You shall see the results within a week’.

Three days later, came her call, ‘Pravinda, it works! My mother has now become my friend. In fact she wants to join me on a trek, something she always wanted to do… I am on the top of the world’. I cautioned her, ‘If the prescription is not used regularly, the effects may disappear.’

Talk happens best when the bonds of the relationship are frost-free! Frostiness easily sets in relationships which become stagnant due to a communication gap. Relationship bonds are better revived through the icebreaker technique of reaching out through personal touch.  Every act of caring, every word of affection helps bridge the distance between minds and hearts. 

We do use the icebreaker technique when starting out on new relationships, but ignore it in existing relationships. With time, we take things for granted and presume that icebreaking is not required for our close relationships. The ice that freezes interpersonal communication is the result of the switching off of the emotional connectors. This ice must be broken through acts that touch the heart.

The gulf between hearts can be bridged by acts of care…

Let’s BE BETTER at breaking the ice that makes talk rare!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

Mumbai, India.

the END?

In Simla’s DAV public school, students were promoted to class XI before the board exam results were declared. Once the results were announced, some boys were sent back to class X. Surely; a worse form of humiliation did not exist. However, Anupam was confident of scraping through in his class X exams.

One day, right in the middle of the class, his father suddenly arrived to take him to Balji’s – a restaurant the family would visit only on special occasions. The boy wondered about the reason for the treat as his father ordered his favourite dishes. After a delicious meal, his father confided, “Son, you have failed your class X. This celebration was to prepare you for failure so that you are never scared of it.”

This priceless approach was indelibly etched in Anupam Kher’s mind. Later, it turned out that his father had seen the wrong result. Further on, the thespian just scrapped through for his degree. Yet his life has by no means been a failure. Rather it has been a journey of being undeterred by letdowns. He says it so well, ‘everything turns out just right at the end, and if does not, then you can be sure it is not the end.’

Too often, we let everyone’s opinion matter and herald the beginning of the end. Every time, we find ourselves at a seeming dead end, we must remind ourselves that optimism is the only way to live. Losers are not ones who fail… losers are ones who succumb to failure and give up. Actually, failures and failings are very much a matter of perception.

Do not let the illusion of a dead-end, make you wait

Let’s BE BETTER at crossing every failure’s gate!

- Pravin K. Sabnis