An Italian priest, Fr. Gatti who taught me just for one year in school, was my guiding muse for over three more years. His influence on me has been a part of earlier posts of Monday Muse. His stories opened my thinking to see both the larger picture and the intricate detail. One such story literally cleared my vision.
A shopkeeper was forever disparaging of his competitors' storefront windows. "Just look at them”, he would say, “Surely, they are the dirtiest windows in town.". Everyone was tired of the man's continual criticism and fault-finding remarks about other peoples’ windows.
However, one day over coffee, when the man carried the subject just too far, his smart customer suggested the man get his own windows cleaned. The shopkeeper followed the advice, and the next day at coffee, he exclaimed, "I can't believe it. As soon as I washed my windows, my competitor must have cleaned his too. His windows are clear and you can see them shine."
It was all very clear. The problem was with HIS windows. Since they were dusty, the others appeared shabby, too. Too often we are seized with identifying drawbacks and weakness of others, but the reality remains that our own minds are in negative condition or conditioned negatively. So before we categorize others as worse, we must discover how we can BE BETTER ourselves. After all, Confucius once declared, "Don't complain about the snow on your neighbor's roof when your own doorstep is unclean."
The singling out of the worst in others must go
Lets’ BE BETTER ourselves and may our actions show.
regards
Pravin-da
Monday, March 31, 2008
Monday, March 24, 2008
SOUP?
Job Interviews are conducted to assess a potential employee to see if he/she has the required competencies and attitude. And in recent times, innovative situations are created to assess the reflexes and responses to find out who is better than the rest. Just consider the following case:
All the candidates for managerial positions are educated about the organisation’s vision, mission and systems through a striking audio visual presentation. Next the presenter announces, “Ladies and Gentlemen, the interview shall commence after a 30 minute recess. Till then, help yourself to some delicious soup.”
Everyone begins to queue up at the serving table… even those who do not want the soup, choose not to be part of a slight. The atmosphere is one of discipline… no pushes and shoves… smiles flash around… everyone knows they are being watched and hence the best behaviour is out on display.
The bowl is gracefully lifted… a prompt “thank-you” is uttered as the waiter pours the soup… One moves further, to gracefully add a series of additives that await… chilly sauce, vinegar, pepper, salt, etcetera. The assessment is complete! Everyone who adds without tasting and checking out whether the soup actually requires add-ons find themselves in hot soup as far as the interview is concerned
In the quest to assess who is better, the ones who fall aside are the ones who use resources without considering whether they are needed. To BE BETTER than the rest, we must ensure that our behaviour is based on situational thinking instead of perfunctory behaviour. And we have to start with unlearning habits and embracing a responsive approach that shuns the mechanical unthinking.
We must unlearn habits of mechanical inclination,
To BE BETTER lets indulge in responsive action.
regards
Pravin-da
All the candidates for managerial positions are educated about the organisation’s vision, mission and systems through a striking audio visual presentation. Next the presenter announces, “Ladies and Gentlemen, the interview shall commence after a 30 minute recess. Till then, help yourself to some delicious soup.”
Everyone begins to queue up at the serving table… even those who do not want the soup, choose not to be part of a slight. The atmosphere is one of discipline… no pushes and shoves… smiles flash around… everyone knows they are being watched and hence the best behaviour is out on display.
The bowl is gracefully lifted… a prompt “thank-you” is uttered as the waiter pours the soup… One moves further, to gracefully add a series of additives that await… chilly sauce, vinegar, pepper, salt, etcetera. The assessment is complete! Everyone who adds without tasting and checking out whether the soup actually requires add-ons find themselves in hot soup as far as the interview is concerned
In the quest to assess who is better, the ones who fall aside are the ones who use resources without considering whether they are needed. To BE BETTER than the rest, we must ensure that our behaviour is based on situational thinking instead of perfunctory behaviour. And we have to start with unlearning habits and embracing a responsive approach that shuns the mechanical unthinking.
We must unlearn habits of mechanical inclination,
To BE BETTER lets indulge in responsive action.
regards
Pravin-da
Monday, March 17, 2008
ANALOGY
My favourite orator, Dr Oscar Rebello was speaking at a public meeting about the land grab taking place in Goa and the complicity and connivance of the Government in aiding the illegalities… He could have rattled off facts and figures to buttress his argument. However, he once again exhibited his genius in connecting his communication with his heterogeneous audience. He spoke thus…
Consider the case of our lovely mother who is a nice human being. She is caring and has done only good to others. Now consider our father who is an aggressor against our mother. He abuses her and worse, snatches her jewellery and household things and gives them to another woman. What should we, as children, do to our father who is brutalising our mother? The audience roared to say “teach him a lesson”…
Oscar immediately made his analogy… Our lovely mother is our motherland, Goa.
Our father is the Government that rules us. The other woman is money bags out to circumvent the law and loot Mother Nature of her precious possessions. Nothing more was required to be said. The message had been communicated in all its clarity.
Analogy is the expression of the cognitive practice of transferring the message as understood by the speaker to the listener in a way that the listener can understand. It is based on the principle that effective communication is all about keeping it simple. The hall mark of a good communicator is the ability to BE BETTER at using the power of analogy as against the agony of wordiness.
To BE BETTER in getting our message across,
The use of analogy can sure reduce the fuss.
regards
Pravin-da
Monday, March 10, 2008
PROGRESS
“We all want progress, but if you're on the wrong road, progress means doing an about-turn and walking back to the right road; in that case, the man who turns back soonest is the most progressive.” – C S Lewis
Progress is a connotation that means different things to different people. It can be as personal as our self-centredness or as global as wider concerns. It can be conditioned by immediate needs or liberated by a desire to leave a legacy. It can be seen as a corollary to development of technology or the advancement of humanity. It can be about a better present or about a better future.
Once while educating students on the need to re-look our tendency to abuse water as a resource, I stressed that drinking water was going to get scarce, due to indiscriminate development. A bright boy asked, “With technological developments, one day it will be possible to treat sea water and convert into drinking water”. The point he was making was that it was always possible to find new solutions to the problems created by certain aspects of development.
After appreciating the lad for the intelligent intervention, I communicated thus: The Jaipur foot is an important technological development for those who lose their limbs. But would it be correct to amputate our healthy limbs just because we have a remedy? We cannot BE BETTER by scouting solutions for problems we insist on creating.
Embracing fundamentals based on a vision of equity, justice and self-reliance, for the entire humankind, should always be the priority. Progress cannot be walking the path to the future whilst destroying the present. And most importantly, as Lewis says, it is about having the courage to leave the wrong road and walk only the one which benefits all the people and the environment around, not just of today, but of tomorrow as well.
When technology exceeds our humanity, it is surely regressive…
to BE BETTER is to let our shared advance to be truly progressive
progressive regards
Pravin-da
Progress is a connotation that means different things to different people. It can be as personal as our self-centredness or as global as wider concerns. It can be conditioned by immediate needs or liberated by a desire to leave a legacy. It can be seen as a corollary to development of technology or the advancement of humanity. It can be about a better present or about a better future.
Once while educating students on the need to re-look our tendency to abuse water as a resource, I stressed that drinking water was going to get scarce, due to indiscriminate development. A bright boy asked, “With technological developments, one day it will be possible to treat sea water and convert into drinking water”. The point he was making was that it was always possible to find new solutions to the problems created by certain aspects of development.
After appreciating the lad for the intelligent intervention, I communicated thus: The Jaipur foot is an important technological development for those who lose their limbs. But would it be correct to amputate our healthy limbs just because we have a remedy? We cannot BE BETTER by scouting solutions for problems we insist on creating.
Embracing fundamentals based on a vision of equity, justice and self-reliance, for the entire humankind, should always be the priority. Progress cannot be walking the path to the future whilst destroying the present. And most importantly, as Lewis says, it is about having the courage to leave the wrong road and walk only the one which benefits all the people and the environment around, not just of today, but of tomorrow as well.
When technology exceeds our humanity, it is surely regressive…
to BE BETTER is to let our shared advance to be truly progressive
progressive regards
Pravin-da
Monday, March 3, 2008
LEARNING LESSONS
There are days in history which are painful.
Yet if we learn from our mistakes,
we can ensure we are not revisited by
the same painful history and its accompanying hurt…
It is been two years since Goa joined the mainstream of the organised communal violence. After the riots, there was more shock than outrage, because Goans had actually relied on the myth that their famed communal harmony could never succumb to such brutal violence. The smug belief, that peaceful Goa could never be synonymous with hateful agendas, came crashing down.
The seed of hate gets planted in the fields of prejudice. And these prejudices are ploughed by the divisions of religion, ethnic, regional, economic and every divide that sees one human being as lesser than oneself. And when, this hate in full bloom is harvested, the community sees the final manifestation of communal politics which is communal violence.
In the aftermath of any riot, as peace returns, everyone, save the brutalised victims, starts getting complacent. And the vested interests, on all sides, start planting the seeds of hate again, under the garb of nationalism, religion, ethnic pride and the like. These messengers of hate talk about “teaching them a lesson”. And they forget that lessons are not meant to be taught. Lessons are meant to be learnt.
To BE BETTER is to have learnt from the lessons. We must learn the lessons for ourselves. We need to sift the grain from the chaff. We have to begin with cleansing our own minds of prejudice and hate. We need to initiate and participate in dialogues to undo the divisions within human beings. We must strive to BE BETTER as human beings by actualizing the humane values of sensitivity, tolerance and peace.
The lessons of history are meant for learning, not fighting…
Prejudice can never be the path to BE BETTER as a human being.
yours-in-hope
Pravin-da
Yet if we learn from our mistakes,
we can ensure we are not revisited by
the same painful history and its accompanying hurt…
It is been two years since Goa joined the mainstream of the organised communal violence. After the riots, there was more shock than outrage, because Goans had actually relied on the myth that their famed communal harmony could never succumb to such brutal violence. The smug belief, that peaceful Goa could never be synonymous with hateful agendas, came crashing down.
The seed of hate gets planted in the fields of prejudice. And these prejudices are ploughed by the divisions of religion, ethnic, regional, economic and every divide that sees one human being as lesser than oneself. And when, this hate in full bloom is harvested, the community sees the final manifestation of communal politics which is communal violence.
In the aftermath of any riot, as peace returns, everyone, save the brutalised victims, starts getting complacent. And the vested interests, on all sides, start planting the seeds of hate again, under the garb of nationalism, religion, ethnic pride and the like. These messengers of hate talk about “teaching them a lesson”. And they forget that lessons are not meant to be taught. Lessons are meant to be learnt.
To BE BETTER is to have learnt from the lessons. We must learn the lessons for ourselves. We need to sift the grain from the chaff. We have to begin with cleansing our own minds of prejudice and hate. We need to initiate and participate in dialogues to undo the divisions within human beings. We must strive to BE BETTER as human beings by actualizing the humane values of sensitivity, tolerance and peace.
The lessons of history are meant for learning, not fighting…
Prejudice can never be the path to BE BETTER as a human being.
yours-in-hope
Pravin-da
Monday, February 18, 2008
AGAPE
John Lee identified six basic styles of love that people use in their interpersonal relationships: Eros (romantic love), Ludus (love as a game or sport), Storge (friendship), Pragma (love driven by head, not heart), Mania (obsession) and Agape (selfless altruistic love). Agape is akin to caritas (charity) where the gift of love is sans any expectation.
Every 14th February, across the globe, the emotions of love are out on display. Flowers and gifts are exchanged between loved ones, all in the name of St. Valentine. The immensely popular Valentine's Day greeting cards have turned into a highly profitable industry. Some go on to celebrate other occasions, like birthdays, anniversaries, etc, to display their true love to their loved ones. But more often than not, Ludus and Pragma overrule Eros & Storge and Agape is at sea.
It is pertinent to note what happens on “non-occasion” days. It is back to “routine” for most… a routine that is mechanical and impersonal… a routine that finds little time to see, speak or listen to our loved ones… a routine that plays blind, deaf and dumb! Invariably we presuppose our loved ones and hence, we take them for granted. In the fast moving world, the expression of love has become a circumstantial commodity whose display is dictated only by occasions.
To be better at love, we must move from need-love to gift-love. The spirit of agape cannot be an occasional emotion. We must share quality time with the ones we claim to care about. It is about enquiring and listening to our loved ones rather than supposing and speaking. It is about wishing people with a smile in the morning, evening, night… every time we meet them (we are more likely to wish a stranger more often than one’s spouse or child).
The measure of love is to love without measure
Indulge in agape and as a human be better!
yours-in-agape
Pravin-da
Monday, February 11, 2008
NERO’S GUESTS
Nero fiddled while Rome burned – is an oft quoted statement that is not based on historical reality. However, the real fact of what happened after the burning of Rome remains out of our information. That dark incident was exposed by Magsaysay award winner, P Sainath while speaking at the D D Kosambi lecture series, in Goa.
After the ruin of Rome in the fire, the atmosphere was one of depression. The time was also one of rebellion. To deflect the attention from the incident, Nero hosted a lavish dinner party. The guest list was a virtual “who’s who” of Rome. The elite, the learned, the artists… everyone was invited. However, there was a problem of illumination. The torches were running short of oil. Nero ordered for his captive prisoners to be tied to the torches so that they could be the fuel for the torches.
Sainath said that Nero’s action though barbaric, was in keeping with his royal attitude of insensitivity. But, Nero’s guests who devoured the feast, despite the screams and the scene of this inhuman act, are the ones who are greater culprits. Not one of them raised a voice of protest. They just gorged! Sainath raised the question – who were Nero’s guests?
Neros’ guests were educated men of art. They were people who took pride in describing themselves as cultured persons. They were people like you and me. People living in comforts. People who get entry into the social circles of the powerful elite of politicians and businessman. We are Nero’s guests, partaking in the feast while the oppressed poor burn at the torches of injustice.
Indifference is said to be a greater crime than hatred. No matter what we do develop our lives, it is of no consequence if we kill our conscience. To be better as a human being is to connect better with our humanism. And humanism is all about standing up to the values of truth, justice and equality. To be better, we must be sensitive as well as responsive to what is happening around.
to BE BETTER as a human, shed the indifference and inaction…
Quit playing the Guest and stand up to Nero’s brutal actions!
Regards
Pravin-da
After the ruin of Rome in the fire, the atmosphere was one of depression. The time was also one of rebellion. To deflect the attention from the incident, Nero hosted a lavish dinner party. The guest list was a virtual “who’s who” of Rome. The elite, the learned, the artists… everyone was invited. However, there was a problem of illumination. The torches were running short of oil. Nero ordered for his captive prisoners to be tied to the torches so that they could be the fuel for the torches.
Sainath said that Nero’s action though barbaric, was in keeping with his royal attitude of insensitivity. But, Nero’s guests who devoured the feast, despite the screams and the scene of this inhuman act, are the ones who are greater culprits. Not one of them raised a voice of protest. They just gorged! Sainath raised the question – who were Nero’s guests?
Neros’ guests were educated men of art. They were people who took pride in describing themselves as cultured persons. They were people like you and me. People living in comforts. People who get entry into the social circles of the powerful elite of politicians and businessman. We are Nero’s guests, partaking in the feast while the oppressed poor burn at the torches of injustice.
Indifference is said to be a greater crime than hatred. No matter what we do develop our lives, it is of no consequence if we kill our conscience. To be better as a human being is to connect better with our humanism. And humanism is all about standing up to the values of truth, justice and equality. To be better, we must be sensitive as well as responsive to what is happening around.
to BE BETTER as a human, shed the indifference and inaction…
Quit playing the Guest and stand up to Nero’s brutal actions!
Regards
Pravin-da
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