FOMO

FOMO is an acronym about ‘fear of missing out’. It refers to the feeling that others are having more fun, living better lives, or experiencing better things than you are. It involves a deep sense of envy, affects self-esteem and causes stress.

 The idea that you might be missing out on a good time is not new. However, it has only been studied during the past few decades, beginning with a 1996 research paper by marketing strategist, Dr. Dan Herman, who coined the term.

 Social media has accelerated the FOMO phenomenon. It makes us compare our regular life to the highlights of others' lives. Social media creates a platform for bragging; it is where things, events and even happiness itself seems to be in competition at times.

 To overcome FOMO we need to change focus from what we lack, try noticing what we have. It helps to take a digital detox or at least consider limiting our use of certain social media apps that make us feel as if we are missing out.

 We post on social media to keep a record of the fun things we do. However, we end up being bothered about whether people are validating our experiences online. A better option is to keep a personal journal of our best memories and shift focus from public approval to private appreciation of the things that make our life great.

 We must seek and make real connections. Rather than trying to connect more with people on social media, arrange to meet up with someone in person. Make plans with friends, organise a group outing or doing something social.

 Most importantly, we must involve in gratitude. It is harder to feel as if you lack the things you need in life when you are focused on the abundance you already have. You will begin to feel that you have what you need in life and so do other people.

 FOMO takes you down the rabbit hole of depression

Focus on what you have instead of inane comparison!

 - Pravin K. Sabnis

 #mondaymuse20thYear #pravinsabnis #since2004 #motivation #blogging #MondayMuse

LOOK INSIDE

‘Lessons are not meant to be taught, they are meant to be learnt.’

Introspection is one knowledge process that stipulates personal initiative rather than be a diagnosis for somebody else. The results are liberating in terms of widened understanding of the situation and our role-connection to it.

The word is derived from the Latin term of introspicere which literally means to look inside. It is the self-observation of our own reasoning and behaviour. It involves reflection on the impact of our thoughts and actions on others as well as ourselves.

However, it must go beyond only looking inward. ‘Looking inside’ can be a valid tool for looking forward based on aspirations. Visioning can lead to effective results in practice for goal-oriented functional challenges.

Imagine a traveller on a journey. ‘Looking inside’ would include looking at the path covered (past), the location as of now (the present) and the road ahead (the future). We must look at our original intentions, our actions and the impact of them on ourselves, our thinking and also on the situation that surrounds us.

‘Looking inside’ is a personal exercise as well as a personal initiative. It involves taking ownership as well as responsibility of what we are and where we find ourselves. Rather than look at what others ought to do, we must look inside!

It is easy to tell others to learn the lesson…
Look inside to involve in true introspection!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

Summit

Snow never melts atop Mount Everest… winds at the highest altitude summit reach 200 miles per hour… overall a very difficult challenge!

 George Leigh-Mallory is first recorded as attempting the climb in 1921. On his third try, in 1924, he disappeared into the mist, never to be seen again. It is believed that he reached the top but slipped and did not live to tell his tale. The mountain had won.

 However, friends of Mallory gazed upon a large picture of Mount Everest and declared, 'Mr. Everest, you defeated us once. You defeated us twice. You defeated us three times. But, Mr. Everest, we shall someday defeat you because you can’t get any bigger – and we can!'

Eight more attempts were made on the mountain resulting in eight more failures. Finally, Hillary and Tenzing defeated Everest. Since then, there have been over 11,346 summit ascents by 6,098 people.

Failure comes only after we have given up. If the odds of winning are slim to none, they might be worth taking. Surely, we can get bigger and better – better in ability; better in experience; better in wisdom; better in faith.

Scale the summit, blunt failure’s knife
Commit to take on challenges in life!

 - Pravin K. Sabnis

 

Show-How

A trainer observed that his wife took 20 minutes to prepare breakfast, while he scanned the morning papers. Over many days, he made a note of her many trips to the fridge, to the cooking stove, to the dish rack, to the sink... 

 

He concluded that his wife’s efficiency was adversely affected by the excessive trips she made to different parts of the kitchen. One fine day he made an effective decision of sharing his know-how with his wife. 

 

He explained to her how she could get everything done in 10 minutes if she were to follow his plan derived from his observations. She thanked him for his know-how and asked him to show-how!

 

Since that day, he prepares breakfast in nearly 30 minutes while his wife scans the morning papers!

To be better at utility, ‘know-how’ needs to be backed by ‘show-how’. To know how to do something better is never enough, never mind the quality of observations made about another’s performance. We must be able to apply our stated solutions.

Know-how is knowledge on how to get something done. Know-why (the reasons) and know-what (facts) are important, but theories are confirmed only when put in practice. To state solutions is easy, but to walk the talk is prudent.

Unless we can truly show-how
Not of much use is know-how! 

- Pravin K. Sabnis

Excusitis

Ten years ago, my mother wished to see her cousin whom we had no information about other than that he lived in Pune. It took just a few minutes with the telephone directory and a dozen calls to trace him down and meet him.

 It is common to hear excuses for not having called or visited due to the lack of knowledge about telephone numbers and addresses. In today’s age of information explosion, such excuses are most bizarre and are symptomatic of an ailment called excusitis.

 The word has been taken from the book: The Magic of Thinking Big, written by David Schwartz. Chapter Two is titled ‘Cure Yourself of Excusitis, the Failure Disease’. The term refers to the behaviour that finds all sorts of excuses to justify lack of action.

 So often we come up with unoriginal justifications for the unjustifiable. The person seized by excusitis not only wrongly believes that his stance appears logical, but also tends to be gripped by recurring excusitis in other situations as well!

 If somebody speaks of lack of time, it means one of two things... the person does not know how to or does not want to and is being unabashedly untruthful! Effectively it is a skill thing in the first case and an attitude thing in the latter.

 Excusitis blinds us from our own abilities and makes us shirk responsibility. Every time, an excuse arises in our mind, let’s opt to take charge of our choices, our actions or the lack of them! Escaping excusitis leads to embracing ownership of our lives and our true potential!

 Let’s opt for ownership of every action...

Instead of excusitis as a regular reaction!

 - Pravin K. Sabnis

 

Tradition

 A scientist put five monkeys in a tall cage. A bunch of bananas hung at the top of a ladder. When a monkey went for the bananas, the man would sprays all five monkeys with freezing water. After some time, a second monkey went for the bananas. The man once again sprayed all with the cold water. The man then put the hose away.

 When a third monkey tries to go for the bananas, the other four attack him to prevent him as they want to avoid the consequences. The man replaced one of the monkeys with a new one who wasn’t part of the original experiment and was never sprayed with water.

 However when the new monkey touched the ladder to go for the bananas, the other four attacked him to keep him from doing so. When he tried again, they attacked him again. The new monkey learns not to go for the bananas because he’ll get attacked if he does.

 Another monkey is replaced. When he goes for the bananas, the other four attack him, including the one who was never sprayed with water. One by one, all original monkeys are replaced. Each time a newcomer goes for the bananas, the others attack, although they have never been sprayed with cold water for going for the bananas.

 That’s the way the tradition has built up in an organization. Traditions are a part of every organization, especially if the majority of the workforce has been around for some time. But, those traditions can be detrimental to progress within   workplace, especially when new employees are stopped from pursuing new ideas.

 By focusing on doing something the way it’s always been done because it’s tradition to do it that way, organizations are often rendered blind to new ways that they can get the banana (the prize they’re going after). We must question things that don’t always feel right, and avoid using the excuse of ‘we’ve always done it this way’.

Avoid the grip of irrational traditions

Try new thoughts and new actions!

- Pravin K Sabnis

#mondaymuse20thYear #pravinsabnis #since2004 #motivation

Agostinho

Being afflicted in both legs with polio, he was wheelchair bound. His uncle had to lift with his wheelchair onto the ground floor plinth of his primary school. At the end of school time, his uncle would come to lift him down. The young boy worried about getting heavier and his uncle getting older. So he gave up his wheel chair.

He began to practice walking on his hands. With determination, he was able to scale many steps in life. He won awards in drawing, handwriting, spelling, story writing and singing competitions at various levels. Music was his main passion.

After SSC, he secured Diploma in Garment Technology. He acquired proficiency in computer technology as well as playing the piano. He went to become a musical entrepreneur teaching music to many students as well as producing albums and musical performances.

Besides his many skills of artistry and technical competencies, he would easily climb trees, repair the tiled roof of his home and drive a van that he purchased and modified to have the clutch, accelerator and brake on the dash board at his hands reach. His life’s journey was one moving melody of motivation.

He joined me as a motivational speaker at corporate trainings. Once when asked whether ‘he felt bad that he could not stand on his legs’, his response was prompt, ‘Do you feel bad that you cannot fly like the bird does?’ He believed in counting his blessings rather than the shortcomings.

His positive attitude made him an effective teacher and a loving personality to family and friends. He took on all odds but succumbed to a road accident. Despite his early exit, Agostinho Fernandes’ lessons will live on to inspire the ones who met him.

Polio could not stop Agostinho from standing on his feet

Passion and determination led to many a stimulating feat!

- Pravin K Sabnis

#mondaymuse20thYear #pravinsabnis #since2004 #motivation