WEALTH

Na biwi na baccha, naa baap bada na bhaiya...

The whole thing is that sabse bada rupaiya!

(not wife, not child, not father, not brother...

The whole thing is that the most important is money)

- Old Hindi song by actor-filmmaker, Mehmood

Wealth makes people go around in a never ending pursuit. It is the driving force for everyone, and a principal priority for the ambitious. At the inaugural of ABLE - JCI India’s training program for businesspersons, the Chief Guest, K Vallabhdas shared his father’s take on five types of wealth.

He listed the first type of wealth as personal health. The second is the wealth of relationship that comes from the unquestioning love from the spouse. The third is the unconditional nurturing that we receive from our parents. The fourth is the uplifting affection that is reciprocated by our children. And the last and the least in the list is the wealth of money.

All of us run too often behind money at the cost of the four greater forms of wealth. But money will come to nought if the first four are lost. Interestingly, the four concerns cover a wider spectrum of a better world for all of us. For we cannot makes our homes better for our family, elders and the children better without ensuring an environment of health and security, a world driven by responsive and responsible actions.

Let’s BE BETTER at acquiring the wealth

that comes from loving family and health !

- Pravin K. Sabnis

Alleppey, Kerala

PERSONAL ANTHEM

150 years after his birth, Rabindranath Tagore’s legacy as a poet, novelist, musician, and playwright continues to inspire… as does his poem - ‘where the mind is without fear and the head is held high’. While the entire poem is inspirational, the first line articulates the apt vision for a nation and its citizens.

In the film Sholay, Gabbar Singh said the immortal lines, ‘jo dar gaya, samjho mar gaya’ (fear is death). Our fears are part of the conditioning that we are subjected to since our childhood. Gandhi described fears as creative imagination. They grow to a magnitude that blurs our sense of perception. We must overcome these fears to be unfettered in our flight to newer horizons!

So often we indulge in plastic pride. While arrogance is self-defeating, true self-respect and self-esteem are the psychological foundations for the progress of every personality. They empower individual initiative and help fulfill dreams. ‘Head held high’ also refers to looking ahead to the vision that beckons.

We sing the national anthem that Tagore wrote. However we may have been a better citizenry and a better nation if we were to regularly recite and enthusiastically embrace the words of ‘where the mind is without fear’. Surely, it is an empowering anthem and it would be better if each of us chose it as our guiding lighthouse… as our personal anthem.

Overcoming fears and enhancing self esteem, we find

is the way to BE BETTER at empowering every mind!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

RISE UP monday-muse-12 July

Imagine a situation where a person trips and falls to the ground. What should he do? Should he wait for somebody to help him rise on his feet once again? What if there is no help forthcoming? Surely in such a scenario, most of us should choose to rise up on our own.

Self initiative is necessary to overcome an overpowering situation. Whenever our spirits are down, we must lift them ourselves. Proactive persons who take prime responsibility for changing the situation or even a downward mood are the ones who refuse to stay low. They opt to rise up on their own using the simple choice of self-help.

However, being the first to help oneself is not a practice to be employed only in times of defeat or despair. Even, when we deserve to rejoice over the smallest of success, we must choose to initiate appreciation and celebration. It is a lesson, we must learn from the footballer who scores a goal. He does not wait for his team members to come and applaud him. He immediately breaks into a frenzied run of celebration.

Too often, we shift the onus of support as well as appreciation onto others. And when none is forthcoming we sink into a deeper depression. We must learn to be better at taking ownership of all the happenings in our lives, both, the ones that lift our spirits and the ones that sink them as well. That’s the way to rise up, every time!

Let’s BE BETTER at initiating the right response

... to rise up above the overbearing helpless pause!

- Pravin K Sabnis

CHARISMA

All of us are influenced and impressed by charismatic people. All of us seek to be owners of charisma that can influence and impress others. It is a special quality of impact personalities whose principles, purposes and powers differentiate them from others. To be called charismatic is considered a valuable compliment!

Many of us believe that charisma is a trait that cannot be developed since it appears to be a deep-rooted personality characteristic. But, it is pertinent to note that it is a quality that can be acquired and learnt. For example, being enthusiastic and emotionally expressive is a major ingredient for dishing out charisma – and surely, it is possible to learn to become emotionally expressive.

Look around at people whom you find charismatic. You will notice that they smile easily and seem constantly enthused. Notice that their ever eager energy is very visible. And this is so because they do not hold back their actual feelings. The best method to develop charisma is to be better at expressing our feelings more assertively, openly and freely.

More importantly, charisma is about transference. Others must validate our charisma. And they will do so, only if it impacts them positively. The way to acquire charisma, according to Dan Reiland is, ‘Be more concerned about making others feel good about themselves than you are making them feel good about you.’

let’s BE BETTER at charismatic effectiveness,

by discovering our emotional expressiveness!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

MAKING A DIFFERENCE

Here’s an inspirational story that I first heard from my favourite teacher, Fr. Gatti... A visitor to a beach noticed that the waves brought along hundreds of starfish. However, when the waves ebbed, they left behind many starfish to die. The man decided to save the starfish. He would pick them one by one and throw them in the water.

A passerby observed the starfish saviour with amusement, ‘There are hundreds of starfish. How many can you help? What difference does it make?’ This kind-hearted man immediately responded, ‘It makes a difference to this one.’ And he threw yet another starfish back to the safety of the sea.

We need to ask ourselves: what difference are we making? Big or small, does not really matter. Surely, if everyone made a small difference, we would be responsible for a big difference. Importantly, for the one who is impacted positively by our initiative, we will have made the difference. And for ourselves we will have made the difference of moving to being part of the solution rather than being audience to a predicament.

Those who initiate efforts, only if results of great magnitude are assured, can never really make a difference. Ayn Rand has said it so well, ‘Throughout the centuries there were men who took first steps, down new roads, armed with nothing but their own vision.’ To make a difference, we must be better at taking initiative, without getting trapped in gauging the scale of impact.

In every situation, let’s BE BETTER at making a difference

... by distancing our actions from the success reference!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

PRAVIN SABNIS conducts UNLEARNING UNLIMITED outbound workshops. MONDAY MUSE is based on JCI-India’s National President’s theme: Touch To Transform (2004), We Are The Future (2005), Speak Through Action (2006), Develop New Dimensions (2007) & the JCI theme – BE BETTER (2008 onwards).

TRUE SELF

An eager student approached a Zen master with a poser, ‘I don’t know who I am. Please, help me see my true self!’ The master just kept silent. The man began to plead and persist, yet the master gave no response. Finally the man resigned to his frustration and moved to leave. At that moment, the master called out to him by name. ‘Yes!’ the man exclaimed as he spun back around. ‘There it is!’ exclaimed the master.

This Zen anecdote reminds me of the number of occasions when I search for my spectacles, only to have somebody else point out that I am wearing them! Obviously, it is yet another funny search to find what already is in my possession. Ditto for our search to discover our true self!

However, if we really look, our true self need not be a blind spot. Our true self is obvious to the ones who encounter us often. Others can see the obvious because they see it in our behavioural responses. If we analyse the consistency or the lack of our behaviour in response to varied persons and situations, we will be able to understand the choices we make based on our wants and needs.

Others can help us realise what we really are, but it is only we who can choose what we want to be. Hence, rather than spend time, effort and energy on getting to know our true self, let’s be better at becoming the true self we would like to be. It is important to focus on what we would like to be, instead of only determining what we are!

Let’s BE BETTER at being true to our self…

Rather than a shallow search of our true self!

- Pravin K. Sabnis

WIIFM

In most organisations, leadership responsibilities include the important tenet that motivation to achieve goals is proportional to the extent that self-interests are satisfied. This theory is popularly known as ‘What’s in it for me?’ or WIIFM. To put it simply, the WIIFM principle states that self-interest is the greatest motivator.

The WIIFM principle is used by many motivators to find out needs, desires or motives of their team members. These needs are determined by asking people what they want directly or indirectly by observing what interests them. Unsatisfied needs can make one experience the drive to pursue goals and satisfy his needs.

However, self-interest need not be of selfish nature. It is pertinent to note that helping others can satisfy self-interest. Surely, even being humane results in an experience of need satisfaction. For instance, not everyone participates in community work to satisfy the self-interest of recognition. So many do it because it satisfies their self-interest of making a difference to the situation or maybe just feel good!

Persons who involve in positive, proactive work have actually aligned their WIIFM with a broader vision and a larger mission. They are the ones whose self-interest lies in looking at larger interests of society. All of us need to be better at ensuring that our WIIFM is progressive and sensitive to the greater needs of humanity.

Let’s BE BETTER at looking beyond where self-interest stood

WIIFM should align with needs of the greater common good!

- Pravin K. Sabnis