Performing

Last Saturday, renowned singer, Gauri Pathare was speaking as chief jury at the 14^th Samraat Sangeet Sitara – a contest for Indian classical singers. She had words of guidance for the contestants. She defined the meaning of the term ‘performing arts’.

Pathare said that it was pertinent to note that the term was ‘performing’ not ‘performed’. She underlined the relevance of current performance irrespective of previous show. Hence we must focus to be better at all times.

She also made the point of setting the sights on a higher bar so that one always falls short of getting there. Such an approach results in an awareness that the best is yet to come. And this awareness keeps us rooted as well as spurs us to greater skies!

It is said so well that ‘best is yesterday… today be better!’ So often, so many of us are content with previous performance. We get lulled into complacency or arrogance that comes from a feeling that success has been achieved.

While we must celebrate our successful performances, we must not lose focus on the ongoing acts. When we concentrate on the ‘performing’, we ensure the right flow. Resting on laurels creates a stagnancy that stifles potential. The way to ‘performing’ is to keep on carrying out the mission by keeping a challenging vision.

Let go of the past performances old

Performing will take you to true gold!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Worthwhile

Pedro took his father for an annual medical checkup. His father was not ready to go through the routine, as he felt that he was hale and hearty. When the results arrived, Pedro’s father threw a fit.

The reports declared that everything was in order. Pedro’s father grumbled, ‘I knew all was okay… it is a waste of your money… and my time!’ Pedro asked, ‘would you have been happier if the reports had confirmed major issues?’

So often, so many of us are seized by a disproportionate expectation on every return of investment. We worry whether time, money, or effort spent is worth the while! We set the anticipation and are distressed by the lack of fulfilment of that expectation.

Is it necessary to do a medical check-up only when ill? Should a vehicle go to the mechanic only when things go wrong? Should we do things only when they are inevitable? Should we sort issues only when they loom large?

While it is okay to keep an eye on the worth of our while, it is silly to be over obsessed by it. It is worthwhile to spend time, money and effort to even just confirm that things are okay… whether it is to confirm the status of our health, plans or relationships. It can be worthwhile to do things even when the situation does not overtly demand it!

Don’t be over obsessed by excessive expectation

Worthwhile are also acts sans single anticipation!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Goodwill

Over the last sixteen years, Monday Muse has missed out only due to lack of internet connectivity. On Mondays, when I found it difficult to write something, I would go to the archives and reinterpret an earlier musing. However, last Monday the gap was due to a void in real life… the passing away of my muse – my mother!

In the aftermath of the death of a dear one, one discovers the departed personality through the stories shared by others. While many accounts were new to me, there was a common phrase to describe my mother… everyone confirmed that ‘she bore no ill will’ to anyone, not even to those who wronged her!

She had a fair share of persons who were unfair to her. She had seen hard times and had faced hostility and crooked behavior. When asked how she could respond with goodwill at all times, she would say, ‘I cannot change the way others behave… but I can choose the way I do!’

She would quote the poet-saint Kabir who wrote so well

‘Kabira khada bazar mein, maange sab ki khair

Na kehu se dosti, naa kehu se bair’

(In the market stands Kabir, with goodwill for all;

no favour for anyone nor any ill will)

Goodwill is to wish someone well. And to do so, one has to overcome ill will. It is okay to be hurt, angry or sad due to unacceptable behaviour of others, it is okay to argue or quarrel with them… but it is not okay to wish them ill. When we bear ill will, we lose our humanness. We get consumed by the anger or misery that the ill will throws back.

Goodwill is an intangible asset that adds to our worth. When we wish someone well, we hold onto compassion, kindness and cheerfulness. Goodwill for others makes for a happier person who exudes the joy that comes from freedom from bitterness. Like my mother whose goodwill now lives in the hearts of many!

Never let hurt trigger off ill will

Choose the asset of goodwill!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Unused

Pedro’s uncle was showing off his collection of bottles of cashew feni. He proudly proclaimed that the feni was over 30 years of age. Pedro pleaded, ‘can I have some?’ 

His uncle snapped back, ‘If I had given this feni to all those who asked, it wouldn't have aged to be 30 years old. It is going nowhere till I am alive’

Pedro asked, ‘and then?’  

While ageing of alcoholic brew can be purposeful, in this case Pedro’s uncle’s primal purpose is to avoid sharing. His feni is not being kept to drink after ageing… rather it is just being unused.

So often, we end up holding on to things that we have no intention to use… now or later! We have unused clothes, crockery and a host of things that are not going to be ever used by us nor do we allow others to use them.

It is said so well that ‘Sometimes older is better, but sometimes it's just older!’ We must examine the things we hold on unused. We must discover use for them, either for self or for others, lest it be rendered useless!

Without purpose do not refuse

Useless oft are things unused!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Touch

My favourite trainer, Fredrick Tucker had a favourite story of an abandoned baby that was wasting away in a hospital… it was not responding to treatment and the doctors were forced to enter its condition as ‘hopeless’ on the examination charts. They had virtually given up hope that the baby would recover.

A doctor, who had uncommon success in dealing with sick children, was called in as a last resort. He instructed to dress up the baby in nice clothes and put it in a cradle next to the hospital entrance. He asked for a large sign requesting passerby’s to hold the baby and play with it for a few minutes before moving on.

The method was ancient, but very effective. The baby turned healthy as visitors began to speak to and fondle the baby. The positive strokes of touch and the words of love was the balm that healed and transformed the life of that little baby that was suffering from a lack of touch and positive strokes.

Touch is a primal need, as necessary for growth as food, clothing or shelter. From the nuzzles and the caresses between mother and infant that form the foundation of the self, to the holding of hands between a son and his dying father that allows a final letting go, touch is our most intimate and powerful form of love.

However, touch is not just about physicality. It is about all strokes that come from our body language to the tone we use and the spoken words. Words of encouragement or a smile of approval are equal to an appreciative pat on the back. We can touch the inner core in various ways to encourage, motivate, support or just convey love.

Touch through strokes, fulfill the need

Not just physical, use word and deed!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Sales Talk

Pedro took his old donkey to the market place and sold it for Rs.6000/- The man who bought it immediately put it up for auction. ‘Look at this fine animal’, he shouted to passersby. ‘Have you ever seen a better specimen of a donkey? See how clean and strong it is!’ He went on to list the many qualities of the animal.

At the end of his sales talk, a man offered to buy it for ten thousand. Another man offered fifteen thousand. A third offered twenty. Pedro who was watching was amazed at the interest everyone was showing in the donkey.

Pedro was impressed, ‘What a fool I was to think it an ordinary animal.’ He suddenly realized that the owner had received a good offer and was about to close the bidding. Pedro shouted out, ‘Rs 30,000/-‘ and brought back his donkey at five times the cost he sold it for.

We are easily swayed by sales talk! Our assessment of value is based on projected worth. Packaging holds sway over the product inside. We allow ourselves to be deluded and persuaded instead of noticing actual worth.

The greater lesson is we do not realise the value of our possessions or that of our close ones. But when someone else projects what we have given up on, we realise the true worth of what we regarded of less value. We must escape the lure of sales talk and recognise the real worth.

Sales talks is actually projected sound
Recognise true worth when it is around!

~ Pravin K Sabnis

Afford

On a cold winter day, a heavily dressed man noticed a poor man outside wearing little clothing and asked him, ‘I am wearing all these clothes and still feel a little cold, while you are barely wearing anything, and seem unaffected by the weather?’

The poor man replied, ‘I don't have any more clothes, so I can't afford to feel cold. But you have plenty of clothes, and thus have the liberty to feel cold."

So often, so many of us become victims to the comfort of the lifestyle that we have acquired. Our experience is dictated by the splurge of plenty. Since we can afford, we end up consuming more than we need. On the other hand, those who cannot afford, learn to leave within their means.

We must learn to free from the burden of dependence on the unnecessary. When we choose to live a life that is free from the comfort zone, we choose liberation. Our body and mind can handle challenges better if it is not over constrained by over indulgence just because we can afford it!

Never mind whether you can afford or not
Choose liberation from burdened thought!

~ Pravin K Sabnis